2004-01-05 - 12:41 p.m.
I thought I'd give an update on my Buffalo JD/MSW freind who stuggled with her pregnancy and mental illness this past Fall. Just weeks after her suicide attempt, my friend had a car accident, and tragically had a miscarrige within days. I told her there's a saying "God works in mysterious ways" and that maybe this was his way of intervening as she was not meant to have this baby now. I tried to be supportive through the grieving of the child she named Morgan on the death certificate. Sisters Hospital in Buffalo also had a memorial service for all those who have had miscarriages, which my friend was glad to be able to attend.
She went to a good lawyer, one who was able to get compensation for the damage to her car as she was hit by a teenager without a license or insurance who attempted to pass her on the right and make a left turn in front of her at record speed. He didn't make the turn, but slammed into her instead, then decided it would be best to drive off. She followed him and thankfully IDed the car.
The tragedy of the miscarriage was hard for her. She had not however been stable emotionally or physically. Her back was also thrown out in the accident.
After some weeks on diability for the back, and some weeks back on her needed medication for her mental illness of severe depression, my friend DID stabalize, and is now thankfully back to work and feeling good.
A number of positive things have happened for her. She filed bankruptcy and got her finances in order. She got rid of the car she couldn't afford. She moved to Amherst into a wonderful subsidized apartment which is habitable and actually NICE as well as affordable for her. It is also in one of the best school districts, so she hopes to be in that community for her daughter for a while.
She re-united with perhaps the only HEALTHY boyfriend she has ever had. Although he is "unexciting" and at times "boring" he is STABLE and employed and loves her AND her daughter very much!!
I am so happy for her! When she is well, this woman is just an incredible person. In the past, she has won a grant to start a community project in her pathetic South Buffalo sick neighborhood, she has won numerous scholarships, including the Deans scholarship at UB LAW, and she is a force to be reckoned with when it comes to community service and problem solving. She had literally RAISED her MR brother after her parents death, assuming guardinship of him when she was herself 19. He graduated from HS, without even knowledge he is MR, and works as a full time prep chef for a fine restaraunt. She was so proud when he had an 86 in his 12th grade REGULAR math class with her tutoring!
So I am happy my incredible friend, who survived the death of her crack addicted father, the death her way too young mother who's lungs went out she is sure due to the pollution from the foundry across the street from there home which deposited white soot IN their house regularly, and the difficultys of IEPS for her brother... and his teenage years... who survived poverty to make it through school with a JD AND an MSW, who works as a counselor in the Erie Correctional Facitily where she attempts to rehabilitate prisoners, or at least to convince the officials to give them NEEDED medication for their mental illness... who made it through abuse, stalkers, and psychos, and eviction this fall, and bankrupcy-- is NOW back on track with focusing on herself and her wonderful daughter in a positive place!!
She also has found E-BAY! She had been selling off old antiques. So she has a new source of income from her loved hobby of collecting things! She is applying her creative talents to this along with her boyfriend who has the computer knowledge.
HE even set up a personal web page for her for Christmas!
So best of all- her life is postive now, and my friend has joined the world of on line journaling!!