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2005-05-07 - 1:13 p.m.

Katerina's Father really is a self centered asshole.

Katerina told me about a program she learned about at school that a flyer came home about. She expressed interest and her Dad helped her in applying for it. He told me this morning that he got her into it.

Of course that was his excuse to call me as I had called from a STRANGE phone # and asked for Katerina and she wasn't home. OF COURSE- she was at Grandmom's like always on weekends.

I got over my rule of NOT calling HER HOUSE ... and Dialed the Grandmom's # AS I WAS IN THE MIDDLE of filling out the official "MAIL LOSS/RIFLING REPORT" form for the US POST OFFICE. Interestingly I was in line to mail something while here in NY this weekend when the postal worker was handing that form to a lady explaining how it worked, and that POSTAL INSPECTORS then get involved so it's the best way to address problems with packages being lost as there is then greater accountability! HE said that often the lost packages are suddenly FOUND... BEFORE the postal investigators need to REALLY get involved in an investigation.

INTERESTING AS THE BUFFALO POST Office manager failed to mention that form! So I got THREE copies of it . One for me, one for my mom and one I'll drop in the mail to Katerina's Grandfather who might be interested in it as well.


Anyway I was pissed first of all that after I had called her DAD Katerina's DAD said she was at Grandmom's then hung up. Then he undoubtedly noticed the # was unfamiliar so immediately had to nosily call back the home # (WESTELY TOLD ME HE CALLED AS HE WAS HOME AND ANSWERED IT) THEN my cell # . WESTLEY Called and said HER DAD called. WESTLEY asked what he called for, and I told him "BERCAUSE HE's being nosy and noticed the # I called from wasn't the home line."

I mean the guy can't call me to initiate one conversation about the kids ALL YEAR but then has to call back as I called from somewhere other than home??
HE's annoying and also predicatable.

AS I WAS BUSY I SAID "Now' not a good time" and curtly in response to him saying he wanted to tell me about the educational program Katerina is excited about "I'll look it up on line."


So I finished my paperwork for the post office and then called him back out of courtesy. I was REALLY THINKING : the trial is in fucking two weeks. You've waited this long to attempt to converse with me as a co-parent-- GO FUCK YOURSELF and stop the BS of making a last ditch effort at making a SHOW of that on the sound advice of your attorney. I'll talk to you about WHATEVER you want in relation to the kids in TWO WEEKS ASSHOLE. That is if you interest STILL HOLDS that long and your not too tired from the sudden surge of effort!!

I was inclined not to call him back at all and just read about the program and talk to Katerina herself. But I called back lest it be then used against ME that I didn't respond to his grand oveture.

So I politely listened as he told me about the program. I should have thanked him for the info and left it at that.

Instead I said "SOUNDS great, but has it occurred to you its not fair to Katerina to set her up for a fall like this? If you do win custody as you aspire you of course realize then she'll be with me for the summer."

And which the asshole had the fucking nerve to say "Well, this program could affect her whole future. It would be worth skipping the summer for her to go to this."

I lit into him then! I told him I NEVER pulled that FUCKING CRAP with him of preporting that any educational opportunity was MORE important than her relationship and time with him.

He then re-iterated and said that if she didn't get into it NOW for this summer that she wouldn't have the opportunity later.

And that's when I REALLY went off. I shouldn't have, but I did.

I went off on how that would be REALLY great. KEEP her THRERE so she could take advantage of a program designed for IMPOVERSHED CITY MINORITY CHILDREN who have never had decent educational opportunities in life. I said OF COURSE KATERINA WOULD EXCEL as she doesn't REALLY fit that criteria! I said, "THAT MAKES SENSE... KEEP HER OUT OF AN ACTUAL PRIVALEGED ENVIRONMENT WITH STABILITY AND ALL THE ADVANTAGES OF AFFLUENT SUBURBAN COMMUNIITES... So she can be FIT CRITERION ....when he knows DAMN WELL that she'll have equivalent educational opportunity WHEREVER WE ARE."

I was ANGRY and let it show... said my peace... likely too much!
AND THEN I HUNG UP.


I AM SO PISSED AT THE NERVE OF HIM. ITS ONE THING TO FRAME THIS AS LOOKING FOR THE BEST OPPORTUNITIES FOR HER PROACTIVELY BECAUSE WE DON"T KNOW YET WHERE SHE'LL END UP, but it's another thing TO BE AMBIVALENT about the program SHE'S WANTED TO DO BEFORE (THe MATH ONE AT UB, CITI HONORS, EVEN GIRL SCOUTING... ) and then SUDDENLY when he has a new attorney to express interest in the long term... and then to FRAME IT AS MORE IMPORTANT than her RELATIONSHIP with ME.

HE's just a fucking asshole. ITS JUST DAMNED POSTURING ON HIS PART.

ANyway- Here's the program which I don't object to AT ALL!

http://www.buffaloprep.org/history-frame.html

EXCEPT that I think it looks to be a little weak in the area of SCIENCE and strong in the areas of the arts which of course Katerina will thrive in. I mean boasting of taking kids to museums and zoos doesn't seem like its as impressive as the other program she didn't get in. It isn't something that would make me feel like its an opportunity she WOULDN't get elsewhere (WHICH I FELT THE OTHER MATH INTENSIVE PROGRAM CLEARLY WAS ! THAT PROGRAM ENTAILED ACUTAL COLLEGE COURSES AND CREDITS!)

But nonetheless if she ends up staying there it is something to be excited about.

And if I 'm lucky he'll state EXACTLY what he stated to me in argument of why she should stay in BUFFALO at which anyone with any common sense is going to think "WHAT A JERK"

Maybe that jerk factor of which parent is going out of their WAY to thwart the time with the other parent will work in my favor as I have NEVER been a jerk! I have always encouraged any time he was willing to give- TO MY DETRIMENT AND THE DETRIMENT OF MY FAMILY WHO WERE ANNOYED I NEVER WOULD GO WITH KATERINA AND SOREN TO VISIT THEM OVER HOLIDAYS AS I GAVE THEIR DAD PRIORITY!! HES A SELFISH ASSHOLE! SO I SENT THEM TO HIS MOTHER'S for the FEW HOURS HE'D GIVE THE KIDS instead of going to MY PARENTS IN FLORIDA!

THEY HAVE COMPLAINED HOW THEY WOULD LIKE TO SEE THEM MORE. I ALWAYS SAID THEY WERE WELCOME TO DO SO ANY OTHER TIME- but NOT THE TIME RESERVED FOR HIM!!!

HE'S TOO SELF ABSORBED TO EVER THINK OF THIS. AS IS HIS SELF CENTERED MOTHER!

ANYWAY.... KAterina and Soren were not even "home" at Grandmom's to talk to. THEY HAD gone out to play with the neighbor kids.

SO I tried to remember what books I sent, and finished that form today. Glad its done.

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