2006-04-09 - 9:14 p.m.

It's past bedtime so I have to tuck the girls in very soon. I am enjoying being back on line though- even for just a few moments here! I went to Computer City and bought a new wireless adapter as Westley had literally STOMPED on the old one breaking it in a juvenile tantrum a few weeks back.

What else is new.... same old story of him losing his cool. At least prior to him doing so he HAD listened to me tell him
1. that IT IS NOT NORMAL to be FREAKED OUT when someone puts something on the counter EVEN THOUGH they are kitchen counters DESIGNED for cooking.

and
2. THAT IT IS NOT NORMAL TO HAVE SUCH AN ANGER MANAGEMENT PROBLEM THAt something like the above would render him so out of control that he starts to YELL ABOUT IT.

AND HE ALSO HEARD

3. "YOU COULD TAKE OWNERSHIP OF THIS PROBLEM AS YOURS AND SEE A DOCTOR AS YOU COULD TAKE MEDICATION FOR THIS!"

My comments didn't result in him agreeing and making an appointment, but at least HE DID LEAVE THE ROOM and didn't continue to yell at me! (EVEN THOUGH HE DID GO AND STOMP ON HIS OWN NETWORK ADAPTER which I had been using on my computer!)

At least he then DID go upstairs for the needed space to be alone to calm himself down!

And at least he LATER AGREED IT WAS STUPID THING TO BREAK HIS OWN THING AS HE WAS ANGRY and HE DID IDENTIFY this was a CONTROL MECHANISM As he had felt so very OUT OF CONTROL!

And he also shared with me that he saw a biography of HOWARD HUGHES and told me about how he had mental illness I believe of OCD (maybe something else too?) which apparently got WORSE as he got older. Westley told me that in watching the biography HE IDENTIFIED WITH HIM as he recognized some of the very same traits IN HIMSELF!

When we were DRIVING AROUND FOR WHAT SEEMED LIKE FOREVER last SUNDAY to find a SUITABLE RESTARAUNT which Westely would AGREE to take the children and I to I reminded him of that and that it REALLY IS JUST A BIT OCD like to be AFRAID to eat at most retaraunts which in fact DO HAVE OPERATING LISCENCES and PASSED DEPT OF HEALTH INSPECTIONS. He really HAS come a long way with self awareness as in those moments I can TELL HIM WHAT I SEE as over the top behavior and I like to think I actually Do so in a manner that offers some reassurance and is helpful.

In the end last Sunday we did end up at an Italian pizzaria which ironically is VERY CLOSE to home (after we drove all around Syracuse for about ONE HOUR!) He kept driving PAST places as they didn't look good to him. And all the chains were just simply out of the question.

I have to admit that was the best pizza I have has in a long time... I don't know if that impression was assisted by the longride making us all exceptionally hungry or if it really was that good, but I did overhear one customer say to the guy working there "You have to open a shop in CICERO, you'd make a killing" The guy was getting a pizza to go and it seemed he drove FROM CICERO as he said that it was worth it to come for it. I have no idea where the heck that even is in relation to here... but it is most definately not just around the corner. So I think its great we actually discovered a place that meets Westley's criteria which is ALSO close to home and had great food.

I am letting the girls stay up a bit late as they are in the middle of a ballet. I have to give them this time to be creative since they saw a dance preformance today and are still excited by it. They were very good at the store afterwards, and then we came home to dinner and so I am allowing them just the few moments more to dance as they are still energetic. Raitlin had fallen asleep and napped rather late after the shopping trip so no wonder she is not tired.

Interesting ballet of KAtie's She is singing "God on the cross He is perfect on the cross...."
and now " I was born at Chirstmas time..."

I am now watching the Passion of Christ in a way it has never before been conveyed.

The title of the program we saw today was itself marvelous;

TO DANCE OR NOT?
WE MUST !
IT'S OUR PASSION!

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