2017-01-05 - 4:36 a.m.
I was looking up the public defender to find out where to send a letter on behalf of my neighbor and friend who has a bond hearing and that article came up. POOR lady What is sad is the court seems to not understand FEAR. There is some presupposition that fear is transient and momentary and that it is not rational for it to be held onto for longer than minutes. Because the lady had time to run upstairs then downstairs to get a chair or whatever she got to stand on then it was not deemed credible she was terrified and acting in fear. SO WRONG I mean I am STILL Terrified sometimes. My children are still terrified sometimes and its been 10 years now since actual abuse at the hands of the man that threatened to kill me and made my children fear for their lives.
My 14 year old still is angry YES IT IS ANGER. She is now angry but that is a emotion that doesn't have to be exclusive of fear. I don't understand how the prosecutors argument that the action of this battered wife was in anger made her actual fear not a legit defense.
I think that is the wrong argument to discredit her fear. Its more like TERROR and it is VERY REAL.
I am not arguing that makes her murder of her husband defensible. I am only arguing that it was indeed legit fear. I mean if someone has legit threatened your very life and choked the breath out of you that is not something that goes away. The FEAR that that person wants to kill you STAYS WITH YOU and will resurface now and then if that person who attempted to kill you is still in your orbit.
I can't claim to understand the feeling that there is no way to overcome and manage that fear but the self defense of KILLInG the perpetrator of that abuse. I don't understand that and thank GOD I don't understand that, or rather I think that is not accurate. I think I DO UNDERSTAND IT but I am grateful that I have not allowed my mind to entertain the thought "What if he dies? Would my terror go away? would we be in peace?"
And I don't encourage my oldest child who has not yet forgiven to visit here often!!! I understand her reluctance.
She is working through her trauma in the most beautiful way possible. I am SO PROUD OF HER as she does what she can to turn her pain into something beautiful ART and POETRY And MUSIC and it is just absolutely stunningly beautiful and astounding and inspirational.
She deals with the acceptance that we can not change our past. BUT THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE that was the message of her beautiful artistic work We must acknowledge and sit with the trauma to claim it accept it and understand it and recognize what we can not change but then move forward to try to write the story of our lives from now on. There is that hope that although there is destiny of what already is and who and what we are due to having been broken so, there is hope that even though we can't CHANGE That which already occurred perhaps we can just not resist and be angry at who we are and accept who we are and learn to live in happiness even in this flawed state of our grace having been tainted our innocence lost.
So onto my neighbor for whom the search of his public defender led to the murderess of her abuser....
He's the guy who has been legit arrested a couple of times; but then in addition has a rap sheet ridiculously padded with what I see as the "Walking While Black" charges.
That is not to imply he is guiltless. NO he WAS Walking while INTOXICATED while walking while black.
ANd HE DID HIT HIS STEPCHILD in anger, of overboard discipline and the consequence is that her Mom called the cops and he was being kicked OUT OF THE HOME as she will NOT tolerate abuse of herself and her children.
HE HIT HER a couple of months ago as well. I know that as I saw her cut lip and also saw where she had hit him and they both were sad and upset and hurting. I think she lost it first but regardless both my friends hit that low point and hit each other and the key factor is this occurred when he was drinking and he had little emotional control and she was overtired as she works nights and often lacks sleep and whatever set off the fighting they both failed themselves and each other that night. I supported both in calming down and they both tried to improve and both accepted they may be best off not continuing their relationship. HE was continuing to go to work and try to support his family but he was also considering living elsewhere. He has been trying to manage his issues.
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE YES THROW THE BOOK AT A PERPETRATOR OF THAT.
I'm ALL for that. Let's avoid homicides! Lets avoid years of abuse and PTSD and then men who kill their wives or women who kill their husbands or kids who lose it and have mentally ill boyfriends kill their abusive parent. (ALL THINGS that have happened in my community since I lived here!!!)
ENOUGH lets NOT IGNORE DOMESTIC Violence. LETS GET PEOPLE REAL LEGIT HELP and lets get people separated from each other so they can learn to live in peace.
I have NO PROBLEM with that
But tackle REAL issues. There are enough REAL problems we have no need to INVENT Some that are fluff while ignoring RACISM and SEXISM.
ITs just fluff that from one incident there are four or five different charges. Some is BS.
My social worker friend says the practice of padding the charges seems to be a norm so that if they pile on additional charges SOME will stick and its insurance JUST IN CASE there is some defense. That seems like a ridiculous legal game to me which should not be played when it comes to one's constitutional freedoms of life and liberty and the pursuit of happiness! I mean I get it if there is some administrative law and its not truly consequential to a PERSON .... to legalistically perhaps try to fit scenarios into the code as written. But this crap that was done to me of bringing up a charge to try to tailor something as innocuous as being a couple min late to school into some unrelated legal code and claim a criminal act and this bs of ridiculous charges on the lengthy list of my neighbor so its hard to tell which he ACTUALLY did and which charges are BS( as some are just not credible) It MAKE THIS AWFUL APPEARANCE of a litany of transgressions which sets off an initial first impression of any court he is before. Behaviors he exhibits which are not a crime normally seem to me to be called criminal. Similar to how when my kids were a few minutes late LCPS tried to call it criminal at the prompting of some school personnel (truant officer OR the school nurse at the time who acted negative toward me and honestly I think hateful and I think perhaps was a root of her prejudice. My kids were the ONLY black students at Lincoln but one other girl whose Grandmother worked there, and I swear it was not unrelated to their race that my family was then targeted to be treated differently that any other family at that school.
We were not the only ones late regularly but were the only ones sued. But I digress ITS been a long time but you know I still am apparently angry about that at times. At times like this when I observe someone else being treated differently than my other neighbor's based on the color of skin. I mean my black neighbors GARDEN was mowed over by the HOA. Then this year they refused to mow their lawn. Then they send ME a violation notice for BS after I fixed everything...
The thing is that when intoxicated men walk home from their local bar in this town, or intoxicated young ladies even, or old ladies... who are WHITE.. they don't get "pulled over".
I have in fact only heard of one instance of anyone being stopped for "Jaywalking" and when that happened to my oldest two children they were astonished, offended and highly upset that they felt they were just victims of racial profiling. They were suspect because of being black. They were stopped literally for walking across the street while black and NOT IN THE CROSSWALK.
I also ushered my child in the house. It was in fact a moment which would have been hilarious in some ways if it were not so not funny and very tragic to even have to WORRY about violence. For you see when she opened the door and ran out, my 12 year old had the most INCREDIBLE and REALISTIC costume make up job done of BLOOD ALL OVER HER FACE AND NECK! SHE HAD done the face make up to make herself a ZOMBIE . It was just about a week before Halloween, weeks only after a neighbor boy was KILLED that year (CHRISTIAN SIERRA) when the police responded to his having taken a knife to himself in a suicide attempt and call for help in his mental health crisis- and the responding officer ran into him as the boy was running down the street and SHOT him six times. It was a visceral reaction to a person running with blood coming at him.
So I was terrified for my daughter as these cop cars had just pulled up and circled my neighbor a block away and she ran out with her Zombie bloodied handiwork. She was so PROUD of her cool costume (and her sisters to this day talk of what an awesome job she did with that costume make up); and she was perplexed as to why I ushered her quickly in the house but went back outside letting her know she MUST stay in side for safety, Thankfully she DID stay inside.
Anyway after those experiences the FEAR is still very real and visceral at moments.
once a neighbor's kid was killed it is real terror when you have your own kids with mental health concerns that are sometimes in crisis and there is a fear of seeking intervention that might end up harmful.
So I was looking for the public defenders office address to mail a letter on behalf of my neighbor as I can attest to his work ethic (I drove him to work for six months), his commitment to providing for his daughter, and his character (while of course acknowledging his alcoholism that he has been battling with varying degrees of success. He goes a spell of being dry and then would blow it on a Friday night and have a beer. Seems even half a beer results in this toxic personality change in him .Its more like a awful allergy to beer than alcolism, but regardless of the AMOUNT of alcolhol he considers himself an alcoholic as he HAS to beat the urge to drink at all and ANY amount of alcohol is self destructive to him. Its also an addiction if one can not willfully stop a behavior. Doesn't matter if his addiction is to having only ONE BEER . He still considers himself an alcoholic if that one beer is toxic to him yet he has a craving to drink it that he is unable to control!
So he was telling me one week before his incarceration which is the last time I saw him that he WANTED to go to AA. I had told him I would look up meetings and give him the info, I didn't have to drive him that week as his boss wanted him to be a team lead so wanted him in the construction company yard earlier and started picking him up at 4:30 AM on the way in each day that week .
I was happy as it was time for me to run the marathon and I no longer needed to get up and run regularly to train for it! I met my goal and could sleep in and recover for a bit,
OK... Now I MISS My neighbor as I figured a couple weeks break and I would get back into the running routine.
Without the incentive of getting up at 5AM to leave at 5:30 to give him a ride as I had made a COMMITMENT to drive him it has been REALLY HARD To get out of bed that early!!
The Week before that I ran once and did Yoga a couple times in the morning, It was three morns a week of exercise but not as intense and I have not been consistent and once sick stopped completely as I had no energy.
I did dance the night before getting sick (ALOT!!) Pocohontas brought me out and it was a typical epic adventure with her. We befriended half the bar at the Hamilton in DC and she convinced a few of them to catch a cab and bring us dancing at some Cuban club which was a blast. We danced til 4AM then went to eat breakfast at the one Asian place we found actually open that hour. It was an AWESOME meal these batchelors we met and will never see again from out of state treated us to as they were just so happy to have our company that night as we took them all over D.C. There was an ice storm and Pocohontas had a date that cancelled for that night being worried about the weather Well it warmed up so everything melted by 2pm but people here are skittish at the least bit of snow or ice and don't go ANYWHERE. Its kinda funny! So other friends of hers offered tickets to see the GRINCH at the NATIONAL THEATER I had initially said NO to going Latin Dancing when she called me a couple days before as I felt a cold coming on and was tired. I wasn't up for it. But when she called about the Grinch I said "THAT is something I can handle." Well I was feeling better AFTER that and she was hungry so it was my suggestion to go to the Loft , upstairs from the Hamilton where I know there is often really good music. I figured I would hear nice music and perhaps she could get her dancing fix in. Pocohontas was gracious about going there where I LOVED the band (Kinda 70s fun Motown party kinda with a Hammond keyboard and really solid good bank. These were some local pros who have been doing this a long time.) She was such a good sport but it didn't satisfy her urge to LATIN dance so as I felt better I said I was up for it. The fellows we had been chatting with were eagar to take us, the married couple we were enjoying the company of declines but the four of us who were enjoying each others company went out and just had a blast. We then took a cab to see the National Christmas Tree and just in case you ever have the urge to do the same at 5AM know that its lights are OFF!! Save the trip for daylight.
We had some nice conversation with the cabbie who was trecking us about, enjoyed some GO REMY as an intro to the area a bit (I mean when they were asking about Arlington for some reason I just had to use "The Arlington Rap" as my response")
OK so now after finally writing a bit and getting accomplished that darn letter I STILL Havent' found the EMAIL of where to send it to this public defender. RIDICULOUS I was up til 1:30 yesterday thinking and writing and worrying and reading about the concerns I have about the situation of my neighbor.I did a tiny bit of legal reseach at the end of my work day and came home cooked dinner for girls and got right back at it but it took till NOW TO BE DONE!!!
That's cause I had written SO MUCH I had to edit it all out!!
Then I decided to put some back in.
I really had trouble NOT addressing the context of our community here. In the end I did boldly face the issues of race concerns in what I think was a diplomatic fashion.
I also did not know FRIEND well as her family stayed indoors, and most often the children were not allowed to come out and play as FRIEND was not comfortable with them outside unless under her supervision. As a conservative parent she simply did not allow the freedom other parents in the neighborhood afforded their kids.
The first observation I have is that when FRIEND brought Isiah (as I first was introduced and knew him) into her life and welcomed him into her home, is that there was a very distinct sense of calm and happiness in FRIEND and subsequently her children and whole household. Simply by having two parents home allowed the opportunity for the children to then be allowed to play outside because there was ability to supervise them when outside. Isiah himself is very social and friendly and he frankly made it a point of getting to know his neighbors and subsequently together FRIEND and he became more social with their neighbors in our community. Concurrent with that time, and I have to believe not unrelated FRIEND herself and Isiah clearly were both communicative that their goal for their family was to put God first . FRIEND started the habit of prayer as her first action of each day, and with the counsel and support of her new relationship and strength of her prayer life and spiritual community I observed the remarkable changes in her parenting style, ability to cope and maintain the peaceful calm home that she aspired for. There were many factors at play, however I think Isiah’s presence in her life and home is one factor which indeed was a very positive one overall in the changed dynamic of her family life and her parenting which should not be discounted. I know that Isiah did bring a new dynamic and over time took on the role of teaching and training children of the household as his own. As I became friends to both FRIEND and Isiah we then spent much time in conversation about parenting issues and concerns as they together strived to find the most effective way to raise their children. It has always been apparent that this is the priority of Isiah and this is what he talks about and is concerned about.
When FRIEND and Isiah had their daughter Sharon I can attest that the impact of his daughter only codified Isiah’s resolve to be the best man he could be as he hoped to be both a strong provider for his family as a partner to FRIEND and Father to their children. It is at this juncture where his one clearly negative habit which was holding him back, that of drinking on occasion, was a behavior that he strived to eradicate.
People talk about what matters to them. The other thing Isiah spoke of most often was work. Over the years I have known him I have never known Isiah to not either be working or doing all he can do to find his next job.
I am going to shift to using the name I now call DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN Isiah Smith, (“ DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN ”) as this point in the narrative of how I know DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN that he asked me to call him that. I knew him as Isiah for the first year to two years I was acquainted with him and only after some time did he tell me he goes by “ DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN ” and said I could call him by that name.
This is a man who has an unparalleled work ethic that is dedicated and motivated to finding and maintaining work. I never knew DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN to not be employed for long and admired that he is not too proud to take whatever work he is able to fine. I can attest unequivocally to his habits that what DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN does is very predictable and routine. He gets up to go to work each morning Monday through Friday and returns home to his family after his day of work. I know this for a fact as from June 2016 until one week before his incarceration in October of 2016 I drove DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN to work each morning, leaving at 5:30 AM.
The last week of October DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN informed me he did not need a ride anymore as his boss wanted him to be in the yard even earlier in order to train him to be a team lead. His boss had decided to pick DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN up on his way to work and intended to promote him due to his consistent good work performance.
While it was routine and predicable DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN would get up every day and go to work responsibly, It has also been very predicable that he will try to not drink, succeed for a number of weeks and then on a Friday night , have a moment of weakness where he thinks he can have just one beer. I have heard DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN say “I am just going to have one beer” which is the only untruth I have ever heard him utter. Albeit an untruth, it was honest in intent and belief as DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN was simply deceiving himself in those moments. He however grew in his self awareness and desire to change and a shift noticed is that over the past year he self proclaimed “I am an alcoholic. How can I get better? How can I do better?” on a number of occasions. That was something I had not heard from DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN prior.
One such conversation occurred the day after the whole crew DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN was working with were fired for drinking during their lunch break. The exception was DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN , who as he tells it told his boss “I would never drink at work, I’m an alcoholic.“ Having made his boss aware of this challenge, DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN said that his boss told him that if he maintained sobriety and continued to do the good work he was doing he intended to “Get you one of these” while holding the team lead attire (a jacket or vest or some such piece of clothing DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN described that the team lead wore). After a weekend of drinking on a Friday night and getting into trouble DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN was grateful that while his boss had a consequence of not calling him to work , he also then had the above conversation and made it clear there would be consequences for being irresponsible and drinking however if he could get a handle on himself and “straighten up” his boss intended to promote him. That mentorship and belief in DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN to me appeared to me both to motivate him to live up to the expectation set, and also in a way to create stress and worry in DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN that he would not be able to rise to the occasion and after a few weeks of sobriety and then the encouragement the week that DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN was eligible to sign up for benefits as he made the probationary trial work period and his boss was offering full time with full benefits, DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN again drank.
In parallel with alcoholism is often an absolute inability to manage money effectively to actually achieve a goal of providing for family. This is the obvious. To say DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN met his own expectations would not be accurate, however it is fair to say he was contributing to the household and that his efforts did fiscally make some differences. He may not have been paying the bills which FRIEND primarily still took care of, but when he got his paycheck and was able to buy birthday gifts for STEPDAUGHTER on her birthday and diapers for his daughter Sharon he was exceedingly proud and hoped to increase his income and skills and talked of one day being able to be the provider for his family. He was not there yet but DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN was making progress toward his goals. When things went well for him I saw him thank the Lord and when he messed up I heard DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN at first get angry and blame others but then after that initial reaction I heard accountability and remorse and his desire to try to get help so he could improve.
One week before his incarceration DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN had indicated he did want to find an AA meeting and seek companionship and counsel and encouragement from other men. I had that last conversation I had with him as driving him to work and just before dropping him off at The Kaufman Group that last week of October.
An aspect of his character that I think should also not be discounted but which I admire is that integrity is very important to Tyree. He is honest, perhaps to a fault as he lacks the emotional control to not say what he truly thinks. He doesn’t have a good sense of how to navigate socially in certain environments and situations which is in fact more of a cultural difference than anything else in my estimate. I think it necessary to point out the obvious that it is a challenge for some in a rural white community to look at a urban black man, who talks different (louder than many here; faster than many here; with different jargon and actual language not easily understood by most here) without a natural instinctive fear of the unknown. I expect this from many in our community and I acknowledge I was wary of DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN until I took the time to get to know my neighbor. However I do not expect such reactions from trained officers of the law. Those who serve in that capacity have a higher moral responsibility to all of us in our communities. The expectation is that they will in fact be better than the rest of us at SOME Things, one being the discernment of actual fear and whether it is based on facts or based on instinct without foundation.
I don’t want to make any judgement on the reaction of either officer other than to say that one to me is gifted at community policing and understands and embraces the tenants that in order to be most effective you need to actually KNOW your community and its members and the other simply did not know DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN . The officer who took time to get to know DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN over the years KNEW he was not a threat; whereas I believe the other officer who has not every gotten to know DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN and has no understanding of the whole complex man DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN is that has reacted to DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN ’s unfamiliar demeanor and behavior in our predominantly rural , white and quiet community as a threat. That is not to say DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN himself did not exhibit behavior which warranted the consequences, as he clearly was intoxicated and being DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN a loud , ill mannered and ill spoken man while in that condition. Ill in fact is the best way to describe DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN in such moments and this is where I hope this court can address that very issue in a manner more effective than merely incarceration being the only solution considered.
It is in fact very clear to those who know and love DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN that he is in fact struggling with illness. Alcoholism itself is a diagnosable medical condition and should be treated as such. Furthermore the court is privy to additional information regarding DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN ’s medical condition I was told was shared by his mother Bonnie, and I believe this court and our society has a responsibility to ensure that we do not ignore the needs of those with illness in our community.
Frankly herein lies the big problem : NO one who knows DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN believes he is in danger of actual physical harm to self or others (other than drinking too much which is bad for him and in the moment uncomfortable for those around him to witness). He is not a threatening person normally . However DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN he is self harming in the sense that he not emotionally stable if he drinks and there appear to be some paranoid moments and moments of anger and erratic emotions which may be indicative of a mental illness for which he would BENEFIT from treatment. These arise when he is drinking although they seem to on occasion also occur when he is sober.
However there may not be that threshold met in this moment of DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN being considered enough of a risk of harm to self or others to JUSTIFY commitment for purpose of mental health and alcoholism treatment. ( He also in fact might just have an allergy to alcohol as it appears that even after a half of a beer the shift in his demeanor and mood occurs.) But if he is NOT OFFERED TREATMENT because he does not meet that criteria
THEN if DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN comes out and drinks and an officer of the LAW deems in a moment that he is a threat to self or others , that officer can use any requisite force to justifiable protect him or herself . I am in fear of us having another casualty on our hands as a society if we DO let DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN out. Its not DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN that I think is the biggest threat here, but rather I am afraid of an officers reaction in response to DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN . I don’t think it at all justifiable to keep him in jail punitively as PUNISHMENT. That makes no sense when he can be out working all week to provide for his daughter (which even if he is not capable of managing his money a wage garnishment child support order will ensure happens). I fear him being let out NOT Because I fear him being a threat to self or other but because I fear that an officer of the law might look at this disabled person our society has failed to offer any treatment to and then will KILL HIM.
I think if the court can provide mental health and alcoholism treatment service for the good of our community that is an investment we would benefit from.
However, if we as a society are going to pay for incarceration of this man with a mental illness who lost it when intoxicated WITHOUT treatment of his conditions but only punatively, I honestly think that is idiotic. To lock up a man rather than allow him the opportunity to work to provide for his family for the infractions he has been alleges of seems to me to be a punishment that does not fit the crimes.
Both are fine officers of the law no doubt and both strive to serve our Purcellville community to the best of their ability; however one is serving DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN simply with process of service repeatedly whereas the other is actually providing a SERVICE to DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN as a person deemed worthy of respect. I question not the intent or integrity of either officer; but do think that one is more adept at assessing actual risk and the other is not as experienced and talented at being able to effective get to know our community and DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN in particular.
He starts out talking about the legitimate concerns in his life however in a heightened, overly emptional state in which it is clear he has little emotional control. DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN then bursts into tears most often and crys about and talks about in those moments are the pain of trying so hard to earn enough to support his family; upset that he wants to be the head of household but felt in a moment that his stepchild did not respect and love him; Concern that he is failing as a partner and doesn’t know how to communicate and say what he wanted; and on some days then becomes both paranoid and/or angry if there is a catalyst to make him such. The catalyst which puts him in a state of fear and then fight or flight mechanism kicks in for DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN in my observation has been the presence of police. It appears to me that there has been a breakdown of communication and judgement on the part of both parties in those interactions at times, such that both parties in the interaction are acting on instinct.
I have studied for the BAR exam numerous times. I know that the BAR Exam is designed to trip up the law student who reacts and makes judgements based on instinct rather than critical analysis of the facts and application of the law at issue. I honestly think when looking at the rap sheet for DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN for incidents which occurred when I was home and heard either the playing out of, or heard from DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN who I have always found to be absolutely honest in his conveying of what happened, That there is a large degree of fear based instinctive judgements being made. Not only by DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN who’s fight and flight mechanism then kicks in, but also on the part of some officers of the law.
It is a responsiboly of this court, the officers , and lawyers to critically look at facts at hand and apply to applicable law.
There are certain undisputed facts :
DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN Smith is on occasion drunk ;
Another fact FRIEND will not tolerate or accept violence in her home.
FACT FRIEND and DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN have a two year old child who is dependent on her father continuing to work and provide support for HER MOTHER to have sufficient income to be able to continue to live in the home she is in now.
FACT FRIEND and her children are going to be evicted if they can not pay the rent . FRIEND has maintained that home for eight years but a consequence of this incarceration of DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN is that FRIEND is losing her home. Without the income from DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN FRIEND can not afford to remain there, as she lost not only his income but he watched their baby and other children while she worked night shift.
Even though he is not living there , if DARN LOUD OBNOXIOUS ALCOHOLIC WHO IS AN OTHEWISE MOSTLY DECENT BUT FLAWED MAN is not working then he is not able to provide support such that FRIEND can maintain the home for their daughter.
I CAME BACK To edit to be sure I didn't leave real identifying info her and just want to add that after dropping off the actual letter (which took FOREVER as I couldn't just email it-- I have passwords saved on laptop so when emailed it could not OPEN THAT on a computer not mine!! I don't have a printer so had to go elsewhere to print and had to REWRITE the darn letter first! THANK GOD for my boss who is flexible when calling her if late for work on occasion. I don't do that regularly but after investing time in this felt it was important enough to be late to work to get delivered. Hey I can't WORK as a lawyer so perhaps the best I can do to change our system is as an advocate in the small opportunities presented when someone ASKS for my help. I will not turn down opportunity to invest time in what I think is important and MATTERS to our world ! In the car on the way to work I heard : JOBS are the best defense against GUNS Thought that was spot on. and it could be extended to say JOBS are the BEST PREVENTION OF VIOLENCE "Idleness is the playground of the Devil" is another truism I believe. AND I also was reading a book called Resisting Happiness which spoke of how "Thy will be done" is hard to do in practice as sometimes God calls us to do something DIFFICULT that pulls us out of our comfort zone. I hate to sound self important, but I felt I had to respond to the request for this letter as perhaps it is something I was being called to do that might make a positive difference in lives of others.