2001-10-27 - 10:29 p.m.

I'm feeling very energetic lately because I have started exercizing! I have been running in the morning. On the first day of running again I went out for a run at the beautiful though odd hour of 4:30 am! I had planned on arising early to go for a run, and was really annoyed when the baby stirred at 4am after her Daddy had gotten up to use the bathroom. Daddy of course just had to hold her then, which of course awoke her, so I was then roused to feed her. I dutifully fed the baby and then deceided to go for that early morning run REALLY early since there was a beautiful clear sky with a bright moon.

At the time I was also just livid about something and wanted to run off my anger. It worked so well that at this point I don't ever recall what had riled me up so! The next day I remember venting in an e-mail to friend Michelle in great detail and then feeling like I had completely let go of my issue. The funny thing was that just as I was done venting in the e-mail, the toddler girl sauntered up to me and had to explore what that cool button was for..... that button being the on/off switch for my computer. The lengthy e-mail vanished from the screen and reality... and virtual reality as well as there was no retreiving it. I felt like the act of writing was cathartic and was actually relieved in one way that the e-mail was gone as I'm sure my friend wouldn't find me venting to be particularlly interesting or uplifting.

In the past few weeks I have also started to be the leader of a Brownie Girl Scout troop, and the Tiger Cubs boy scouts. The parents who used to do this for the brownies made it sound so difficult but I really think its not that much of a challenge. I laughed when I read the training guide that says early on "This is not rocket science."

My thought exactly as one woman who had been a leader last year acted like it was so hard that I'd need her help. She said to me "I can show you what a Brownie meeting looks like."

and she started bragging about her great ability. I responded by saying "Great! You can facilitate the activity at the next meeting."

Her mouth popped open, and she said (REALLY_ I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP_IT's VERBATIM:) "I didn't come here to be indoctrinated. I'm not ready to do that just now. I just moved here two weeks ago..." blah, blah etc.. and then dhe repeated "I don't want to be indoctrinated"

hmmmm.... she must have the Brownies confused with something else! I didn't say anything in response other then, "Well this is how it is going to work: If you noticed on the flyer and e-mail sent out, I have set up this troop so that a girl joins with an adult. The adults all rotate the responsibility of running a meeting. I'm sure thats why we had such little turnout."

She said, "Oh-- No I hadn't noticed that."

ANd I said, "OK- Well if you are overwealmed now with your move, I'll give you a few weeks before you run your meeting. I'll put you down for Dec 7th."

So I had her confirm that she could do that.

Its so funny how people act like they are so willing to help, but then when they are asked to actually pitch in they suddenly can't help for some reason.

I think I was assertive enough.... without indoctrinating!

�

�