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2006-07-08 - 2:27 p.m.

I'm pretty sure that Westely has actually been READING this site but never mentioned it! It seems strange to me that when I stopped by our house yesterday that his bro in law came by and said "He is not happy with his parents right now. He doesn't want a divorce and he is getting no support from them."

That just seems like the kind of thing that would have been left unsaid.

I don't know, that and it was the CHEERIOS that I WROTE ABOUT that Westely happened to make a big deal about make me think what is most in his consiousness is WHAT HE HAS READ.

HE basically received Bail and there is a criminal trial forthcoming.

Bro in law WAS NICE to take the gals and I shopping. HE said he had come by after work just to see if we were around and needed anything. HE said he was going to head home and tell the crazy in laws that he took us shopping and that he was helping his neices and they could deal.

He also had a nice message from my sister in law of "I love you."

She has always been supportive of both our friendship and her brother and tried to never let our issues come between her relationship with either and I think she has done that amazingly well! So that was really nice to hear a simple and non judgemental message.

The girls are actually all having a ball playing as we are staying in an environment that is totally kid friendly. Its wonderful for them to BE KIDS and not walk on eggshells all the time!

They have had THE BEST behavior as they don't have any anger from being mistreated and being given the constant message that they are IN THE WAY or NOT BEING GOOD etc...

They thrive with positive reinforcement and positive examples which are SO NICE FOR A CHANGE!

They know Daddy had to go to NY to work and are used to him traveling often so that works well enough until they get to see him again. Although a few of them profess to NOT WANTING TO SEE HIM and are angry at him for all the times they have been hit in so called "spankings" which happened to have hit a leg, or the back, or the butt over and over too damn hard to really be justifiably called the euphenism of a "spanking"

A few things that are so obvious and upsetting in a way: They were ALL AFRAID to go back to our house. I think it important to take them there to get comfortable as I have no idea how this will all pan out in the end.
So we did enjoy some nice time picking berries yesterday (when my bro in law came by)
The sheriff also came by to check on us and asked if we were staying there.

Now I suppose his follow up would be NORMAL considering the circumstances of a Protective Order however it made me a bit weirded out as he was the same one who claimed there WAS NO BOND HEARING at the court when I showed up for it yesterday.

I thanked him for his help then walked over to the domestic court where I was told it was going to be. I had merely asked for the time of the hearing. He claimed "that would be criminal court" and looked at some paper hanging (which I SWEAR I NOTED MY husband's name on) and he acted like it wasn't there. Then he said "It would have been over by now if there was one."

So I thanked him and walked by heading for the domestic court. He said "Where are you going?"
and I said "To the domestic court for the Bond hearing that I am entitled to show up for and present an objection if I choose"
He said "There is none"
and I said
"No- there is one, but perhaps your not aware of it."

I continued on toward the court and then noted my in laws sitting on the bench RIGHT BY THE ENTRANCE to the waiting area for the domestic court.

I totally felt FEAR of passing by them and was afraid they would give me a hard time. I went back to the same sheriff and said "THere is indeed a bond hearing in the domestic court this morning and my husband's parent are right through that door. I would apprechiate if you would observe as I walk through just in case THEY have any erratic bahavior"

So the not too bright sheriff stands like an INCH AWAY FROM ME along with TWO OTHER SHERIFFS and THEY ALL INSIST ON ACCOMPANYING ME.

Totally overboard and missing the point I asked them to OBSERVE.

You would think law enforcement officers would figure out how to do that effectively as if you surround someone there is nothing to observe but I did apprechiate they took on the role to protect!

The family of course was well behaved.

No much else I want to write about except that we are in good company and trying to enjoy that.

My bro in law told me that Westley is in NY which I don't believe for a minute. LAst time there was a PPO he was mowing the top field and later dared to brag of how he was watching me. He complained I had let Katerina's father in the house to chat for a few minutes as I gave the kid update!

I really am so much more comfortable NOT BEING AT THE HOUSE and am not sure I want to go back even if I can. I have to think long and hard about that but am taking one day at a time. I DO think it would be nice if the girls COULD be there but they actually seem AFRAID to go there so that makes me think my reason for wanting to be able to go back FOR THEM may not be in the family's best interest anyway. We'll see.

I had asked that if the court deem a bond appropriate that they hold off for this weekend to give me time to get stuff WITHOUT HAVING TO WORRY ABOUT WESTLEY BEING THERE. His lawyer tried to make it about getting STUFF and I asserted that the request was about avoiding confrontation and avoiding the possibility of my personal property being damaged as he has a history of that.

I did think it rather funny that the lawyer framed " the family has a history of mental health issues"
which is of course ACCURATE (but undiagnosed and UNTREATED in realtion to Westley which is likely a source of many problems!) but AS IF ADD is such a pervasive issue that it could even be an issue in this case.

So when I heard that it made me not trust what my bro in law claimed my husband is thinking at this point. My bro in law claims "That's his parents trying to frame that and be adversarial"
We'll see.

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