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2007-02-11 - 10:01 a.m.

What a wonderful experience to take a lovely shower this morning!! After sponge bathing all week it felt luxurious! Simple things are so apprechiated when you do without them for a little while. I am convinced that is good for the soul and spirit actually.

Wow, if that sensual experience was so amazing I just can't wait for those others I have been so deprived of for years... but I can't go there yet... however once having an appetite for something, at times you miss things when they are not available.

Although nothing was ever so much desired as CHOCOLATE by me as it was when I was in Mexico City and couldn't find any... a theme I have written for regarding women having a satisfied life. If all else fails there is always Godiva to come to the rescue!

And my wonderful brothers have sent me such at perfect times!

(Although to be honest being a true Chocolate snob I don't care for Godiva as its really not the best quality but one pays for Pretty PACKAGING... and yes it is apprechiated...but I swear the $2.50 LINDT & SPULUGI bar is truly better quality! but some day I would love to REALLY explore those fine conissours of France the amazing BOOK CHOCOLATE highlights! I have to get that book someday and research a trip when I am at a point in my life in the distant future to do so!)

I have eyed a recommended bar at the grocery store for years but never could splurge for the $8.00 to get it. Weigman's carries a wonderful VALARONA which is just marvelous... and I now can't even recall the California chocolate maker who uses the plain brown wrapper for that $8.00 bar found in the baking aisle I have coveted..


But my little Valentine's already made me their lovely cards!

Not sure I'll get any other Valentine cards!

Raitlin and I just put Chocolate cupcakes in the oven.

I came on line AGAIN in order to update finances. But before doing so I was getting organized and thinking of my errands to be run. I have to drop off my prescription from my Dr. I met with last week.

It took me a few moments to find it.

I was missing my glasses for about a whole WEEK until I found them last week. THANK GOODNESS for disposable contacts I rely on when that happens.

And thank goodness for the spare CAR KEY I HID that I relied on the past few days as my keys have been missing since last THU.

The weird part about that is that the CARABENER that was clipped to them was sitting on the kitchen counter. They HAVE TO BE SOMEWHERE but haven't turned up.

Trouble is that last night I used the SPARE KEY and for fear that perhaps the others were lifted I didn't want to LEAVE it in the KEY SPOT I have designated for such use. I was suspicious that my house keys and all spares couldn't be found. I DID have a spare set AND I gave my friend a set.

So when she said she was coming by and I asked her to bring me her set it was a little disconcerting to hear her say "They are not in my car. "

When I borrowed her car I noted them in the door of the driver seat. She said they are not there.

The timing of that is interesting to me as it was THU that we had our hearing and I believe that Westely hoped to be able to kick me out of the house after that. So the keys being missing makes me think it COULD be that they were lifted rather than my ADD.

BUT it is AS LIKELY that it is me! I have this issue!
The weird part though is that when I found my glasses they were right on the window sill near my bed. In hunting for them for a WEEK I KNOW I would have come across them there and I didn't I even WATERED all the plants within that week so that makes me unequivokably KNOW that I LOOKED THERE! So that is the weird nagging thing that makes me suspect sabatoge on some occassions.My glasses had first disappeared on the morning of a hearing a few weeks ago. I ended up just adjusting and doing without them until they were found again.

And it wasn't that hard to adjust.

Kind of like ADHD. One learns to live with it and gets used to it.

But nonetheless, it is a joy to suddenly find glasses and rediscover clarity- even when you had functional sight before.

Likewise, it is so wonderful to have the aid of making my days less confused, even though I was functional, albeit with more little quirky issues, prior to taking medication and treating my ADHD.

The only problem I am having now is that the dose I am at is lower than the previous, and I swear that increase made the difference in these little life annoyances to a degree this level I am at is not really helping.

But based on my body weight I think the Dr. didn't want to have me on such a high dose.

Oh well... its just frustrating to me a bit as I know it had helped, but I also know I had some side effects when I was under great stress and FORGOT TO EAT as it is an appetite suppressant.

Its so funny that at night if I do stay awake on the few occassions I can tell when my medication is not in my system at all anymore as I am RAVENOUSLY HUNGRY THEN.

To avoid being TOO THIN I have been having midnight snacks then when I am awake. I think it helps with my weight regulation as my friend/neighbor who stopped by last week told me I look MUCH healthier than when she saw me months ago and she said I looked dangerously thin. I thought so as well then... which is another reason for the reduced dose.

MMMM Time for cupcakes!

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