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2008-01-09 - 11:35 p.m.

I am getting ready for bed. I wanted to check out the site for an artist I will be working with tomorrow. In my so called "willful underemployment" (HA HA) I have thus far not found any job which would even pay for child care to work. I have however found a few wonderful things to do with my time:

One is working as a home health care aid.

I was blessed to have spent Christmas week caring for a quadriplegic gentleman working 14 hour days. It was a real gift to me. And it paid more than the $9 per hour for the job as a home health care aid in Middleburg I am about to take on in my so called "spare time" between caring for kids and continued job hunting.

Today I did a pick up job for a few dollars more than that per hour. It however was fascinating that I once again feel like this is a gift to be blessed with the opportunity I have now. I have the unique experience of sitting in on art classes without having to pay for them. Granted I have to sit very still and try to not even sneeze or blink...and I can't paint... and I feel silly that afterwards I went home and WAS TIRED. But nonetheless, I STILL Get to listen to every word with intense concentration such as I have not ever before experienced for a whole class of any sort! (FUNNY HOW WHEN PAID TO CONCENTRATE ONE CAN DO SO!) I joked with a friend who used to do such work (regularly) "Boy I am so tired after working today!"

I just had to say that with a hearty laugh.... as it seems just ... SO SILLY to be tired after sitting still. And also so silly that with my JD and work experience the best job I have found thus far is as a model for a fine arts class.

But the wonderful gift of this is the ability to sit and listen to these incredible teachers and observe the remarkable talent of the students. Its also marvelous to watch the creative results of each individual artist- how they can each look at the SAME SUBJECT and represent such unique beautiful things they see/create in response. Its just such a wonderous process that I feel blessed to be a part of.

The hardest part for me was to not fall asleep. The classes are three hours long, so that does take discipline and mental energy to hold a pose and remain awake for that long! (Of course I take a break as needed, a stretch once every half hour or so. )

ITs something for the time being anyway. Something is better than nothing. And since the court in its infinite wisdom has ostensibly imputed an income of $3000 a month to me, but for some reason my attorney never presented the monthly payments I have consistently been paying the au pair agency (regardless of whether I have an au pair or not- I have been paying MONTHLY to be able to bring one.) I would think if a court can acknowledge the hypothetical income, they would also acknowledge the hypothetical child care cost such that if I found such a job I could work... but that would require common sense now, which courts seem to lack.

Anyway, since the court allegedly claims that my children's support payments are based on my nonexistent income of $3000 a month AS IF IT WERE REAL,(I SAY ALLEGEDLY AS UNTIL IT IS IN WRITING I STILL DON'T BELIEVE ANY JUDGE WOULD BE SO HEARTLESS TO ORDER THIS)
Well-- I had better take any job I can get short of table dancing in West VA. That is one thing I will not do. OK there are a FEW things I won't do.... but other than those, I certainly am not "Above" honest work, and certainly not "intentionally unemployed"

That being the case, I will happily go through my closet to find an outfit in a bright color (without a patter), and one in WHITE and a few hats and scarfs as I have been asked to bring some "fun" accessories for tomorrow's sitting.

I remember my friend gathering her accessories for photo shoots in college. I always was so surprised she had to bring her own stuff...

I am glad I didn't have to do that for the class I sat for today. I am not a big accessory person. I have my favorite hat, and that is about as far as I get with accessories on most days. I am most likely to lose a beautiful pair of earrings that are given to me as a gift....
Or most likely to lose a Movado watch... or silk scarf etc....

Perhaps that is why I am not big on accessories. They require too much work for me to keep track of! (HA HA)

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