Get your own diary at! contact me older entries newest entry

2009-09-28 - 11:26 p.m.

This is cool.

I refrained from leaving a snarky question for Max about why women play dumb when around men and pretend to need their help to win their affections, and it WORKS, and furthermore why men are not attracted to women who are viewed as an intellectual equal.

** I couldn't leave it although it would have been hilarious to do so as Max indeed did fall for a lovely girl who I KNOW was super smart but who played dumb in one of our college philosophy classes in order to borrow his notebook and have an excuse to study with him.

I think that is just a hoot!

A friend (Male) just IMed and I shared the link and story of Max in college and he gave me the insight that it must be that male provider/protector instinct which kicks in.

I also shared that when in law school the vocal inflection would even change when some women went from talking about legal issues with a group of women, to having a man enter the scene. The women's body language, vocal inflection and CONTENT changed in such an apparent way! IT used to just baffle me that the shift was so dramatic for some women! I always found that so irritating.

So in response to the protector/provider instinct I joked, "OH So THAT is why when needy and unstable I get all this ATTENTION from men! The trick is to pretend to be needy when you are not to then get that attention!"

HE laughed and assured me I seem very stable to him! * Which I AM, but for the few moments of PTSD that occur at times... and the bit of insomnia I Had the past month. That however was due to the legitimate stressor of being upset over the end of my relationship, so is indeed a rather normal and healthy reaction to that loss. Healthy short term grieving and sadness and anxiety which is now thankfully getting much better.

It felt good tonight to be fully present and HAPPY in the moment of MATCHING SOCKS and FOLDING LAUNDRY. Nice to feel good and enjoy the simple things in life. That was hard for a few weeks when I was sad over the end of my relationship.

WHEW... at least it is not yet midnight and I am not up TOO TOO LATE! If Pocohantas hadn't come over to motivate me to get laundry folded I think I would have been asleep by 9pm as I was exausted. She enegized and motivated me which was nice. I enjoyed the companionship of her and her daughter tonight very much. She also helped sort out some of the summer clothes and unpack winter which was so lovely of her to do!

about me - read my profile! read other DiaryLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get your own fun + free diary at!