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2012-01-14 - 3:22 p.m.

Tarot for Wed Jan 11
" The Four of Wands card suggests that my power today lies in bonding. I celebrate our common connection, success, or attraction and recognize the equal status, protection, or reputation that results in the formation of this union is merely the beginning or negotiation of something new. I am empowered by positive results within the partnership and I transform through teamwork or marriage"

This one is fucking scary! I love reading these things after the fact as they are amusing. Wed is my date night with McGill who picks me up from work, enjoys dinner with me and then helps me get the girls on time. It is sweet of him to do so and this routine started after a few weeks of me TOTALLY losing track of time at work when in "flow" and focused as I tend to do. Its like a time warp when an ADHD person gets hyperfocused. Throw a bit of mania in there with that and the person is like an unstoppable machine who can crank out incredible amounts of creative work that is downright scary ( presumably as the fear of a coming crash.)

The fun Tarot that comes to my email for Thu was cool too as I submitted a kickin propsal at work for a speaker series.

I have been looking for a support group for adult professionals struggling with ADHD in the workplace, or other mental illness and have not found one anywhere. So I decided to start one at my workplace.

So its kinda designed to be marketed as the speaker series, but like the old fashioned quilting bees REALLY has another whole agenda. The demystification and destigmatizing of disabilities in the workplace (particualarlly mental illness as we accept those with disabilities we SEE moreso), and also specifically improving the skill set of those with disabilities in the workplace are the goals. The first is not stated however on my marketing materials!

My company has tremendous resources available for training. I want to use the existing resources and tweak them to be particular to those with disabilities as well as those who manage or work with disabled professionals.

Taking a tape recorder to a meeting so as to not miss vital information when zoning out daydreaming for a moment is one example of a tip that wouldn't be mentioned in a typical training- but I would add in where it fits.

I envision developing the SAME intro for each speaker series- kind of like a prayer repeated by a church, or a company .. the word is alluding me... company or team , not philosophy-- OH YEAH CREDO. I want to craft something shot and simple to remind us all that Successful Mentally Ill Professionals are ALL AROUND US.

I work with an INCREDIBLE group of talented professionals. There are a few from Harvard, many from other impressive ivys, people from all walks of life- AND

I have met THREE ADHD LAWYERS. Yes three who shared with me their diagnosis. One of whom I teased and said "Oh really? I would never have guessed" as I laughed because he was most definately the little kid who could NOT sit still in the classroom and he is now an ADHD adult who drives the whole office equally crazy yet who is SMART, TALENTED and let me tell you if I had to go into a negotiation I would want HIM on MY TEAM. Just like I was a kickin debator and won at moot court effortlessly, I can see this attorney being a HUGE asset at the table in a tough negotiation.

I have met ONE lawyer who confided they failed the BAR Exam the first time around.

I have heard TWO lawyers talking about how they were Average students who got in the 80s as far as grades all through school. One I didn't know ( I have super hearing and overhear conversations ALL THE TIME.) I had to look him up to see he is an Exec with a huge team.I knew his name but had not met him before as it is not my group. It was FANTASTIC to hear him tell of how he applied to TEN law schools and went to the one he did as it was the best one he got into. I applied to 12 so it made me feel so good to know that there are very successful leaders at the top who were not perfect and were average and had to work very hard to get there. It made me feel capable of doing the same to know my in house counsel counterpart I run into every day failed the BAR the first time around. It made me feel good to know that there are three capable attorneys working that are ADHD diagnosed.

That knowledge that you are NOT the only one is encouraging and empowering. It is a huge motivator to know "THEY DID IT! So can I!"

It is a big help that one of those attorneys has paired with another co-worker as my personal coaches. They said themselves as they both came over and said "We are going to be like your life coaches. We are going to bug you once a week- one or the other of us to make sure you register for that BAR EXAM for July. YOU CAN DO IT."

That was such an AWESOME MOMENT for me last week when they came over and said that to me. I mean, thinking of it now literally brings tears to my eyes.

I have two attorneys on our team acting in the role of coach and cheerleaders for ME.

I found it so encouraging.

Thu and Friday of this week I was also thinking of Performance Objectives and personal professional goals of what I want to improve this year. Next week or the one after my boss with meet with me to tell me her expectations for me, but she wants me to put thought into it first and send the ideas to her then she will edit by adding onto the goals.

So I really liked that for THU the card that I read is the JUSTICE Card, one which incidentally has been dominant in the few live Tarot readings I have had. I don't think I have EVER had a live reading that the Justice Card DID NOT show up in. I have NO question that I am pursuing the right life path for my career. Its just a matter of putting forth my best effort to actualize potential and then be open to letting it lead me where it will.

Here is the Justice Card:

"The Justice card suggests that my alter ego is a portal to a Reality Check, whose access to where truth lies is guarded by the superpower of my Karmic Credit/Debit Card. The verdict or results are in and I will get the payoff or payback I deserve today through the natural laws and cycles of accountability, reward, truth and consequences. But the ""return on my investment"" will diminish or intensify until I finally notice or reap the message sown loud and clear. Whichever way it comes in, at least it happens for a reason and keeps my life in balance. So today when it comes full circle, whatever the result, I accept that I will use it as an opportunity to either try again, make amends or make it right. Let it come around in its own time, keep my hands off the Wheel while this ride is in motion, or impose my brand and risk paying the price."

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