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2018-02-12 - 8:28 p.m.

I am glad I amuse myself...

I think it hilarious that tonight my cell phone ran out of minutes AGAIN.

I know it ridiculous.
I should just bite the bullet and stop resisting social norms and stop looking at this shift to cell phones as something awful (Which took place now over a dozen years ago... and which ...frankly was led by a company I WORKED FOR drafting technology contracts...)

It ludicrous I know; but to date I STILL can't bring myself to pay for a dumb contract that includes outlandish termination fees and with any provider known for sneakily adding in extras when not agreed upon.

I just get overly furious by the injustice of this paradigm shift I suppose THEN laugh at myself.

The laugh tonight is that after I met the drummer who told me to call as he would introduce me to the master teacher,
I then LOST MY CELL PHONE for the next week. Not that I don't have a land line...and not that the # wasn't written on a cocktail napkin I could have found in my bag (but which bag? Same issue as Where the hell is my cell phone?)

These things of course will turn up in time, as in when I grab the same coat I had on , or the same purse.
Which eventually did happen.

SO I never stress or worry about such things and go on about my day with all the many things I need to do, figuring I will call someday.

So then I FINALLY reach out and do make a call, send a text...
leave phone home and think about how maybe I will hear back...
check phone a few times expectantly (like maybe twice as I am the most NON obsesssive phone checker...)

recall that thought was in my mind "Maybe the drummer called" when I had a message

but that is someone else's story ;) And that kid is JUST FINE.

Disclosure here however I swear she is on a green smoothie kick which is good, but I think that I perhaps subverted her interest in Civil Air Patrol. NOT INTENTIONALLY but I have some suspicion that not only did she watch the green smoothie recipie on you tube at my encouragement (hoping to get something other than MAC AND CHEESE in her diet), but I strongly suspect she watched OTHER Content of the trancendental meditative hippy who made the smoothie video others espousing raw food diet, kindness to all and stopping killing of animals as it is so damn violent....

All the things her bro said, and others...

Not that this creates much difference in what is OFFERED to this kid as heck while I don't evangelicize about a healthy diet I am not a big meat imbiber..

Almost vegetarian.
Often vegetarian.
Almost vegan...
sometimes eating vegan..

not really out of effort or conciousness or health kick or any great moral reason but out of lifestyle choice made long ago and a preference.

I suppose cause I ENJOY food that is natural and healthy and it just seems more , I don't know... desirable to me. I can't really even stomach fast food.

This is scary to me: There was bread from Paneara leftover at a Civil Air Patrol (CAP) Potluck we went to, so we brought home this one loaf of bread. This bread OVER A month old, heck likely 6 weeks old and still in fridge and TODAY I inspected the last two pieces with wonder. Last week I ate a few- thinking "This is NOT FOOD" This is NOT BREAD. It may be a 'bread product' kinda like 'cheese food product'' which somehow got approved to use instead of the word CHEESE as it is half chemicals and an amazing work of modern science to simulate food? Similarly, No REAL bread would keep for SIX Weeks without mold! SCARY. I ate it anyway out of fascination and was hungry and figured since I normally don't eat crap it won't kill me. Miracles of modern science... progress. The main point I was to make before the bread food aside is my teen QUIT CAP.

She LOVED that org. She lived for it for a year and a half.
Now suddenly refused to go. I have spent the last month trying to convince her otherwise because it was clearly GOOD for her to have something she was excited about that got her out of the house. It was GOOD for her to learn life skills, self discipline and respect and develop an awareness of others , empathy for others and a desire to help others. It was GOOD for her to take pride in her accomplishments within that group. It was GOOD for her to be engaged in community , to have developed friends. It was GOOD for her to meet some kids like herself in some ways (this child is definately on the autism spectrum and there were a couple kids there as well and they were welcomed , well received, treated with respect and really did well there! ) It was GOOD for her to see her HAPPY doing that. But it is also good for her to question paradigms and find the one she fits in as she crafts who she is. I am afraid however it might not be influence of the hippy's videos but just that she figured out that in the training they go to they don't REALLY Have opportunity to actually do anything REAL for years. Its all training. And yes if there happens to be a local tragedy then the training kicks in but she seems to have lost interest. She said something like "The exercises are all FAKE" She felt like her time isn't really helping people. I hope she didn't quite more out of the self interest of wanting to be important! That would be something I think that the character development the program offers would have been really good for as well. Not needing to be self important. Pride is such a destructive thing. We all need some but excessive pride is often before any fall.... So true. So if she is truly interested in helping others and that is why she quit then I think perhaps local emergency services might be of interest to her. Will see, but somehow she thinks she won't be GOOD at that and she was attracted to all the use of technology- the radio communication the computer technology that CAP uses. Heck she was kickin ass on their Cyber Patriot team! This kid had 89 points out of a team score of 170 in one competition. Not too shabby.... If they compiled the right four kids from her squadron I swear those kids could win nationals (rather than the groups self forming... with the friends banding... They just need a bit of guidance to do that and then they could go really far! Ah but that is in her past apparently. Darn... I just don't really get it. She in fact so called quit but then that Friday she texted me "There is a Cyber Patriot thing..." so I took her. So I feel like she DOES like some aspects and this is more about not wanting to push through the challenges! SO THAT is why I hate to see her quit. But NOT being the authoritarian parent I ENCOURAGE but I can not MAKE *nor will I MAKE a teen do something they have not chosen to do. I can offer the opportunity... I can really push and try to get to the heart of their FEAR (if that is it? Is she just fed up with having to run and pass a PT test? I can be positive ... I can do much but I can not FORCE her to stick it out.) So while I am grateful she is on this smoothie kick, I think perhaps there are other influences that allow her to justify not doing this (Even thought that frustration of the challenge of the running was a real one for her.)
Think her awareness has increased to think more about what the military aspect is all about of Air Force and she is trying to figure out if she supports it or not.
She WAS really into the emergency services aspect and frankly I think it IS a great organization to teach kids to think beyond themselves and have a sense of aiming to do good in the world and help others.

Not big on war promotion, with all due respect to our men and women who in good conscience serve believing they are promoting good in the world.

I have written before I think one can fight for peace, argue we spend an obscene amount on WAR and at the same time support our vets.

Not contradictory.

But lets stop sending people to unnecessary wars?

How about that? Stop flexing our muscles to win some testosterone battle of who is bigger..

But I digress.

Main point is I find it ironic that TONIGHT there is a text from drummer.

and my cell phone minutes ran out just a couple hours before.

I really thought I signed up for a MONTHLY plan last time I added minutes! I SWORE I had!

Can not find confirmation of that on their Trac phone web site!

I swore I did the same a couple months back and then the same thing happened! I even increased the minutes and paid more (back in DEC it turns out...) and THOUGHT it was to be re-loaded monthly.

Apparently not.

But you know, for the inconvienience of when this ocassionally happens I STILL Have a hard time justifying using anything other than a trac phone

Cause it was DEC 12 when I last added minutes .
I put $41 on my phone.

Here it is two months later.

$20 a month for cell phone and text.


NO lie.

But then again, that is cause I am truly not all that social!! LOL

CE la vie. will add minutes... soon enough. And call back or text...soon enough.

Was busy tonight and HAPPY To have gotten some really productive marketing work done for the arts org!
We have a twitter and Instagram and FB and flick and they are all updates.

Heck We even have FOLLOWERS..


BUT MOST Importantly. I had a meeting for this volunteer work. YES! It motivated me to STOP WORKING At a reasonable hour!

OK, so I might have to log on after returning home from the library after being here for marketing meeting...
but just for a little while.

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