2021-11-17 - 8:07 a.m.
OK confirmed lover boy was not here when I lost my first phone.
HE is not a suspect in the first missing phone.
He WAS Here when the NEW phone in the new brown small box disappeared. I have a shitty memory but reviewed notes... and timeline of appts... etc.
WHEW I am so glad as he is not a suspect if it was lifted. The fact I was WITH HIM and escorted him in and out-- and that his hands were on me all the damn time frankly LOL
WHEW HE is not a suspect in the 2nd missing phone either.
I so need to have this man in my life and trust him.
Trust comes hard to me-
So thankful for that and will not self sabotage.
I just worry about my own being obsessed and am keeping the balance to be healthy...
I SWEAR he is an addictive personality type JUST LIKE ME who does not succumb to addictions..
I mean I know it is my personality but I have never been a drinker or drug user
HE seems very much that type of person.
But also had recognized his drinking was not good for him. He was getting migranes for one- and so quit driking. But I think it is more than that. He did post somethign about celebrating his sobriety
He wrote that in Early April he hit six months alcohol free for the first time in a decade.
That is still status quo.
I hope he chooses to remain sober and doesn't become deceived that he is not an alcoholic ( IF IN FACT he is one that is... maybe he is not- yes it is possible; but I am thinking not likely that he is not to be honest--- I mean if someone has been drinking regularly for years.... and had an identified issue... hmmm I think it doesn't just disappear and go away because you stop drinking. I think it it more biochemical than just a choice of behavior.....) Just because he could so easily stop the drinking and be sober... IDK maybe it being easy to stop is a good sign of NOT being an alcoholic? BUT I don't trust it was easy... hmmm..... I just know too many deceive themselves.
That is the mistake some alcoholics make.
IDK if he really is an alcoholic who is dry now; He does not think so
But I just hope he is not deceived
In any case-
When he shared that with me that he has been sober ( I though he told me since last Jan? when he talked to me about it... but his post I later saw would be since last Nov? hmm... which would be a full year coming up.) I just laughed and told him how my girlfriend had joked "you do have a type. Its the alcoholic"
WTF is that about?
I still can't quite figure it out...
The resonance of the energy being attractive-
and it is so hard to describe as this man is quite, introverted, reflective, thoughtful
The energy is not just a physical thing
and I think very real that each person carries a certain kind of energy; of vibe and we are attracted to certain kinds for some reason or another hard to quite ever cognitively grasp.
Have I mentioned lately how much I LOVE MY JOB.
I feel mentally alert today. Its so funny how my brain feels so different today than it did yesterday!! REALLY
feeling refreshed, sharp and READY.
A good sound sleep helped much. AH AS the dog went to the teens room. CORRELATION of if the dog is here and needs to get up in the middle of the night as hears one of the teens awake. IF my teens are on a normal sleep schedule and they don't get up they don't rouse the dog ( she smells ANY FOOD they have! Her senses strong!) and then I get a good night sleep.
SO GLAD they both slept all through last night; as likewise so did we all- dog included.
Nice quiet weekend - 2021-11-27
Life has twists and turns I swear I could never make up if I imagined. Never know where the path will lead! - 2021-11-26
Off to the races... so it feels like.... racing against a missed deadline to market an event happening soon - 2021-11-24
Today will start to learn a Pretenders tune ( forget the name of it- but only three chords! I GOT THIS) - 2021-11-22
One found phone!! - 2021-11-17