2021-12-06 - 6:25 p.m.

I was too dang tired last week to go to the church meeting.
Came home exhausted and decided wanted to just go to bed last Thu. I just didn't have it in me to sit and contribute--
and figured I can pitch the idea and resources NEXT month. We have a new pastor who is getting acclimated anyway- and just ran a few events; and Advent and Christmas are inherently busy ANYWAY so best off wait til Jan meeting anyway.

Today was busy like always. 504 accommodation meeting for my kid who will graduate this year; but for whom it still makes sense to have accommodations in place. My kid is doing GREAT. That is the good news!
I just need to get on the two seniors I have regarding finishing FAFSA and the Common Apps. Many kids are getting acceptance letters; but mine need to finish applications and I honestly stay out of it until the point at which I see they are not moving forward and could use a nudge.
BOTH have identified a school with a program of interest. Interesting thing is they also BOTH happen to have interest in one particular school that is the same. I wouldn't mind at all if they decide they both want to go to the same college! That would certainly make my life easier in supporting them through college years.
A friend of mine said back in the day when he went to college his parents said "Go wherever you want but realize that it will be on you to get back and forth for holidays. We can drop you off but that is it- we are not going to be running back and forth on long trips."

He chose a college eight hours away but managed to get rides no problem using a bulletin board to post the need for one on campus. It reminded me that I met my 2nd husband when driving my friend home to her parents who had the same agreement. They too would not come to pick her up or help her get home holidays- she was on her own. It seems harsh to me now that I am a parent. Then I didn't judge it- but it does seem indicative of a difference in what a family values. I mean I would drive ANYWHERE to see someone important to me and the contrast that my 2nd husband himself wooed me by his willingness to drive long distances just for a date won me over. I mean the commitment to his falling in love and doing whatever it took to spend even a small bit of time together was very attractive. I realize it was in contrast to his parents being the opposite at some level.
I also realize that his wooing me like that set an expectation few can ever meet. Its a funny thing as after the in love phase fell off his priorities shifted dramatically and he was more like his parents and the family system he grew up in. More the workaholic, self absorbed and valuing money over family it seemed. The decision to not drive to pick up a kid was financial; but I am not sure as actually NOT affordable but moreso as not seen valuable enough to invest in which I find sad.

I also recall it being shocking to me when one student on my floor whom I was the Assistant RA for, told me that she did not have a bed at home anymore or a bedroom. She said once she moved out the family rearranged things and it was "like she never lived there." She said they were upset she left them to go to college. She was the first to go, from a rural home in the country. I will never forget this girl.

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