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2022-06-16 - 9:53 p.m.

Art asked "Can I see you this weekend?"

Absolutely!

I have a mess of my house and really just want to hunker down at home and try to get it in order. I have so much to do here and little energy when it is super hot ( as has been these days).

I actually was busy with some volunteer work which was physical. 5 hrs yesterday afternoon and then evening; two of which were acting as the custodian for the school - which is in a building owned by my church and rented out to a school. The church is responsible for facilities management and we are down a custodian. Interviewing and hiring underway.

I did my part as a deacon to pick up one evening to do the mopping as the school needs to be cleaned every night.

Its no joke the amount of physical work custodians do.
I didn't even pick up the trash ( Pastor empied all those baskets); OR clean the bathrooms ( the Director of the school did that!)

I didn't even mop the WHOLE place as someone did the first half (upstairs) before I got there. They left as I arrived ( later than I hoped. Honestly I fell asleep unexpectedly and had a pretty long nap for a good hour and a half- or would have been there earlier!)

I felt badly I did not arrive earlier- but was happy to help them out. The Director reports for work at 7:30 AM every morning at it was 7:30 pm when I showed up to help her out and she could finally go home last night.

But boy was I tired after that. Today I was absolutely exausted.

I just needed a nap and crashed for a while this afternoon.

So when I spoke to Art I let him know I just have stuff to do here.

I honestly am just tired and need to get my stuff done and have so little energy I could not imagine going anywhere.
I think he has more of a need to see each other often. I now am in the mode of feeling like I need to REST.

I think its the heat! I am just so tired.

I want to think of him coming here as motivation to get my place cleaned up and organized and NICE

Its a mess just now.

I did get some things done today in the evening which were pretty important. Its just good to be home and then things get done as I think of them. I don't always plan ahead but when here just sort of ( as my mom used to say-) "Putter around" and remember things I need to tend to- whether it is paying a bill, or adjusting how much is going from my pay into a 401 K so I CAN pay bills....etc...
or reading my mail...
or calling someone I have not talked to in a while.

There is just stuff I need to tend to that I have to be home to get done.

Main thing is cleaning house and setting up a space in celebration of my two high school graduates.

I want to honor them on Saturday. So I need clean house, decorate a space ( porch perhaps weather pending) and bake and decorate a cake tomorrow.

But for now... bedtime. I would like to strip and re-paint my porch but know that is not happening on a day it is to hit upper 90s. That should have been a Fall or early Spring job. One of these days I will get to it. I just have to swallow pride and not worry too much about it. No one is coming over for the graduation party but immediate family. Extended family can't make it and the one friend of the youngest I invite ( who is here a lot) has her family party.
I just feel like I don't want to go anywhere and truth be told don't really want company until I get my shit done...
but I have no energy as of yet to jump in and do it.
Maybe tomorrow I will have more energy.

Maybe If I get up early and go for a swim it will help my day, and energize me. It's a funny thing as exercise used to help me but of late it seems to just make me tired.

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Writing tonight as it's cool and comfortable and quiet just being with my teen. - 2022-06-18

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brunch and nap instead of the late lunch and afternoon rest. Will see how this works for me today...a change of routine. - 2022-06-17

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