Get your own diary at! contact me older entries newest entry

2022-08-01 - 7:53 p.m.

I had a really enjoyable day working at the reception desk of the retirement community.

They finally hired an Activity Director after the role had been vacant for a while.

I kinda wish I could AFFORD to take that job! Even at full time it does not pay enough for me to reasonably support my family without working another job. So it would be counterintuitive to take something like that after working my butt off in my professional career to be able to make a higher rate of pay and work less hours to be home and help family with their needs.

I love the morning full time receptionist hours are 7 AM to 2pm.

Rocking schedule.
I think technically they are til 2:30 with a 1/2 hr break - a 35 hr week for the full time gal. But the afternoon gal comes in early anyway so I was scheduled til 2pm for both today and tomorrow.
(Unless that is her schedule normally! I just know it is an earlier start and gets our earlier than that shift used to. It is actually great to get there by 7 as the newspaper delivery happens early and I tell you getting the schedule out for the day of staff providing direct care of residents so the family and residents can see the plan of who will be there for the day helping them takes just a bit of time. Helping pour coffee is important in the AM!
Actually I didn't do that but the lovely lady who works activities actually came to the desk with the pot of coffee and served me which felt really indulgent in the moment! I was so apprechiative.

Especially as she is the same lady who sometimes works desk ( not the full time activity person ; but a part timer who DID want that full time role and was not given it- then her hrs were shifted a few weeks ago specifically to add me to the schedule).
I mean she really does have reason to not like me! (Although it was not personal. It was the boss' decision and we did talk about it.)
Still I thought it was super kind of her to go out of her way to be kind to me. She is a good person.
I feel kinda badly for her as there is some conflict with some coworkers and she can't figure it out.
I honestly think someone has a chip on their shoulder about anyone who is overtly Christian and carrys that as a part of their identity and displays that part of their self all the time. This lady does so- in her speech. how she talks of God and speaks in terms of faith just naturally as it is really a core part of her identity.

I have NO ISSUE with people bringing their full selves to work- whoever they are.

As a manager I had to deal with this issue years ago. I will never forget the super evangelical holy roller that so many at the one group home I worked with couldn't stand as he was like that. I had a chat with him to not come on strong in speaking in any way amoung the folks we were working for that could come across as him indoctrinating BUT AT the same time we made some calls into the background if we were not sure and chatted with families and my solution was to find which of the residents we worked with DID come from a more fundamentalist faith background in their family.

Hell if that was who their FAMILY WAS and if the person as an adult living in the group home ALSO LIKED the church chat...
I told the OTHER STAFF to get over THEIR discomfort as this was a home in which we make residents super comfortable in being THEMSELVES and having the experiences THEY find enriching.

My solution was find the dude that lived there EXCITED to go to an actual darn revival and put it on the activity schedule. It was a hoot! The one resident was more excited than we ever saw him to go do something in the community. He came from a very religious black family and that family was so overjoyed to have him go to some loud evangelical church revival- tent and all, Southern Style! HA HA This was also up in NY (but that family did come from the South actually). I still remember the joy of that resident and how just making the STAFF be welcomed to bring himself and find how he himself uniquely could enrich the place for some resident-

well it just shifted the whole dynamic.

I talked to the holy roller about respecting others' boundaries. The staff did not want to hear it- at all- so he was told in no uncertain terms NO EVANGELIZING staff unless they express interest in a conversation and ask you.

I was sure as hell not going to limit speech of folks when on their breaks. Hell no
and I told the staff all as much.
In the end it was handled really well as finally no one gave that quirky super religious guy a hard time and they all learned to get along, and respect him. I think some even grew to like him once they got over the issue themselves- which I saw more everyone else's issue than his.

HE also needed some help to learn boundaries.

I do think the lady I work with at this part time job may have just rubbed some folks at work the wrong way with her God talk. I think that kinda sad. I mean she is not old- not by any means; but like me IS an older worker and I think it is the younger ones she works with in one particular space- where she is in charge of activities for the folks living in the unit for those with advances dementia illnessess- who have just an intense dislike of her. That is all I can figure it is about. She has made her faith clear and publicly displayed and some of the younger are making assumptions about what that means. OR She has said one too many "God loves you" type comments.

Condescending perhaps?
CREEPY to a non believer?

I don't know but my GUESS is that perhaps is the issue but no one actually addressed it with her. She just complained that things she put up to decorate a space were taken down the next day and she is feeling bullied. It sounds like alot of actual passive agressive actions and yes it may in fact be bullying-
if there is a whole team undermining anything she tries to do. It also sounds like turf wars with some of the older staff who have been there a long time and then she came into the space with her new ideas but never bothered first to see what their actual patterns and expectaions and HOW they have BEEN doing things works before kinda taking over certain things. (Or trying to! They clearly have been thwarting such).
In any case, sounds like some sort of managment issue to deal with -
and until it does get handled I feel bad for both her as she is upset and the staff she likely has rubbed the wrong way SOMEHOW that she is completely oblivious to.

I mean consider Roe v Wade just overturned. A bunch of young CNAs just might be angry about that at this point.
Older Christian Lady might be feeling some of the misdirected projection of anger at that situation -
cause she represents the same KIND of people that make that decision that their saving of babies is justification to ignore the plights of women who are not like them.
That is what the tension may come down to!
She may be so oblivious of the needs of the women who are not like herself, including those she works with ( OR SO THEY MAY THINK)

I swear it is all ASSUMPTIONS people make. AND YES I am making some assumptions here as to what the rift is between a particular CNA MED TECH I have known for years who this lady has called a bully.
It would be nice for them to hash it out and learn to get along!

I Am tired after today! Nice day at work ,Then ran a kid to Dr. appt; then came back and FINALLY -after the third time today!(Tried once before the Dr. Appt and once after)- FINALLY completed the last inquiry form for Virginia Unemployment Commission and successfully submitted it! NOW I can file weekly claims.

Ironically I think this week I have earned more than the threshold amt for getting benefits. No worry...
if there is a week in which I don't get that many hours offered to me AND if I haven't found another job yet-
it is good THEN I will have the gap fill of unemployment.

Turns out it is $378 a week. I think I thought it was less but that is what it said when I read my letter!
The amount allocated is JUST enough to pay my mortgage with gas money!

So I hope I keep getting work hours and can take home MORE Than unemployment would give me! BUT if I don't it will be great to have the help.

I am tired- just started to doze.

The first thought I had when about to write was, after hearing the news speak of the Washington Nationals game ... "AH.. My guy friend I had the aweome date with is going to the game!" THEN My next thought was
that it is SO NICE to date a man who has friends to go do things with. AND if I can't join him he finds friends who can! I LOVED That he invited me to a game once. It was a Fri night and I couldn't go as had a committment already to drive my kid somewhere. She was too shy to ask a friend to come give her a ride. ( I TRIED!! )
This is the same kid who had an interview LAST week but STILL did not yet complete the job application on line. I mean she HAS A JOB And can start AS SOON as that is done and they call her back in to get set up. I don't understand her dilly dallying...
Gaming addiciton?

I Swear this kid is playing some video game every day.
She acts like she doesn't game much and only plays one game BUT I THINK IT CLEARLY A PROBLEM if you play your one game and prioritize it over everything else. IF you can't get a job application done you WANT to do cause gaming perhaps you have an addictiom to the game?

Anyway- my thought was that it is SO NICE to date a man who has his own life and his own friends!
When I couldn't go to the game he found a Mets fan meet up group and a couple days later went to a game with that group. I thought that was just AWEOME! I mean how excellent! He loves watching the Mets in particular- so how awesome to find a Meetup of other Mets fans that he could join!
The thing is I am TIRED. I need to go to bed now- really early; as again am up to be at work by 7am.

It is so nice to date a man who SCHEDULES dates but then gives me the space I need during the week as he has OTHER friends/relationships to meet his needs! YEAH
NO expecting me to meet his every need and not have my own life!

It is just so refreshing!!

And it is so great to be able to go to bed early and have no one bug me!! Seriously off to sleep...,been dozing!

about me - read my profile! read other DiaryLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get your own fun + free diary at!

I suppose yesterday I really just NEEDED that day of rest. Just kinda was brainstorming ! TODAY doing the budget ( finally) - 2022-08-04


Just some further rambling morning pages. - 2022-08-04


Priorities list to get done now... its getting late !! - 2022-08-03


DAMN mid day nap time I just can't help it on summer days with no AC After a sandwich! - 2022-08-03


Sucks being kinda poor - 2022-08-03