2023-01-28 - 4:29 p.m.

I was just panicking looking at my bank account and wondering how I was going to pay my mortgage.

Then looked at the business account and YEAH

There is a 30 d delay from when I invoice and get paid.

An ACH deposit showed up yesterday from LAST month's sent invoice for one client!

OMG it is SO HUGE to be able to pay back the next intallement of $1000 from the intial investment loan to my business-

this is how it works.

The business is a separate entity . Money I put into the business operations development was my personal loan invested into the business. I mean that was money I ALREADY EARNED. It was already taxed income from my working- the net after that.

SO thank the Lord I have the cash in my COMPANY that I can be PAID BACK the next part of that intial cost for the web side and logo development/design!

IT was worth it as the two clients I have did not know me prior and saw my web site as well as Linked in. So it paid for itself ( Almost- will in one more month!!)

But this month thankfully even though I did not get that many hours at the retirement community-
I can pay my mortgage and bills.

WHEW.

What a relief.

I need to do taxes. I just hope that I did not make TOO much last year and have to pay back the etimated tax (incentive? break?) That was given UP FRONT based on income to the tune of $700 something dollars a month going to my health care policy I bought on the marketplace. The cost of the policy I had was nine hundred something a month. I was paying $268 a month I think for it- and there was a tax incentive given up front of that over 700 a month.

If I made too much to be entitled to that I will have to pay back that bill- I think it was $730 a month. I am bracing myself just in case I get a bill of over $8000 to pay for the Healthcare marketplace policy which honestly I did have to purchase in order for my kid (with chronic illness) to have healthcare! I mean I really had no choice but to purchase a policy or have my kid go without care.

I have no problem paying for it if my INCOME is high enough.

BUT if it is high enough ON PAPER that I am not entitled to a tax break but in reality I can barely meet my bills then there is something very messed up in how all these formulas work.

I am just a little concerned cause the social worker ran my numbers of past few months ( of not working ) when we got SNAP- but possible also if the AGGREGATE EARNED in the WHOLE YEAR is too high and goes over an eligibility threshold all the help I received for healthcare premiums and SNAP will in the end be LOW INTEREST LOANS from the govt that I have to pay back.

And I can't do that without a KICKING GOOD JOB.

I am just being realistic and fully aware of these possibilities.

So in other words I am anxious to do my taxes ASAP.
Was glad today in the mail some W2s and a 1099 came I was waiting for! The good news is also that I didn't really pick up income in 2022 from the new business. I had all of $900 I think in 2022 ( actual receivables/ 1099) for the company. The work really picked up in DEC and payment in January! That works to my benefit thankfully for last years taxes.

It just kinda stinks as if there is a tax return at all it has to go pay back family first and I hope there are no other oustanding debts! (Just a few new medical copays. Not so bad as I did pay of most from 2022. Just a couple from NOV and DEC from the old policy.)

Its just so frustrating as I can see why if get Medicaid some folks with health issues WOULD deem it not worth taking a job to put their health in jeopardy. I always figured being active keeps people healthy- but not if they lose healthcare when they work and can't afford essential medication ( like my kid needs.)

This is the biggest problem ,I have a kid with chronic illness dependent on ME to provide health care and the truth is having a lower in come with MEDICAID is now meeting the kids needs BETTER than when I was working and purchased a policy with copays and deductibles that I could not afford that piled up debt.

The best answer really is a really good paying full time job so will keep trying. It is just so frustrating. I kinda was hoping to just get my surgery done FIRST too,,, then land a job. Optimally to not have thousands in co pay if Medicaid would cover my surgery.

However I finally heard back from the referred to surgeon.

and they will not accept me as a patient. He does a different kind of pelvic floor surgery most often and its not really his expertise.

They suggested I go to University at Charlottesville medical center. Ridiculous as I live no where near there. Unbelievable that can't find a surgeon to take the Medicaid insurance for hundreds of miles. That is the reality of Medicaid. Good in theory but no doctors take it.

The psychiatrist bailed on me considering sessions once I switched to that policy too.

SO I have to kick up my job hunt and hope to find a job with decent health insurance and suck up the thousands potentially in copays/deductibles to get a freaking biopsy and see next step for my health issue.

OR call hospitals ( local? Maybe they will do it and my Dr. can refer me there? But that was my request of her months ago. I did not understand why she didn't just send a order to the hospital?) and Univ at Charlottesville and plan a road trip with my crappy car that is on hospice care itself and drives 25MPh if cold on an incline going up.

SIGH

I am not stressing about any of this as it is what it is. Not much I can do to control the outcome but make calls and assess options. Monday will call back MY ob/gyn.

And do my taxes. (Continue them. Started)

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