2023-05-29 - 9:06 a.m.
Well I did not buy a car off Ebay.
The lister apparently sold it on Saturday so he said and he never pulled the auction listing.
You should not sell something you have also listed on Ebay.
He said he could not cancel the listing? It's been a while since I used Ebay so IDK about how hard that is to do.
A little disappointed but not much cause I am not really itching to have a car yet.
Nice weather perfect for bike riding so suits me fine. Using Lyft is cheaper if I take it 4 times a week home from work and bike/bus the rest of the time than paying cost of car/ maintenance and insurance so economically honestly I woukd like to do without a car for as long as possible until I increase income
Until have increased income it's not really worth it to me to maintain a car.
I can rent one for travel as needed once in a while.
I am happy to have a day off today.
Its raining out
I left the cup reheated in my microwave yesterday and was at work sleepy really wishing for a good cup of coffee. I dud without it. The Assisted Living I have worked at for years is the better job of the two. They have a really nice sitting cafe area with coffee available all the time , right up front for residents/ guests/ staff and a Kurig in break room for staff. I bring in the Kurig pods for staff once in a while too when I see them on the Clearance rack cheap. The $3.50 box of 18 to 25 pods of some holiday flavored thing for example. Seriously those always hit Clearance at my local grocer. Pumpkin Spice in Fall, and marketed Christmas flavors with names like Sugar Cookies 🍪 or some such silly thing from an unknown off brand tgat doesn't fly in this market with few budget shoppers! Ha. One was Blueberry...I mean really who wants Blueberry voffee? I AM NOT KIDDING..THAT EXISTS.
But there have been no deals of late so the Kurig sits lonely at work of late.
The funny thing is I brought the fancy coffee pods in after there was one truly obnoxious family member who came to visit her mom. This woman was something. She just was so entitled and obnoxious in her complaining that the Cafe only had regular coffee and regular creamers
You know the type of Karen...
She was hilarious In a way, her sense of entitlement.
AFTER her sense of entitlement and complaints I then just thought of my coworkers when saw the flavored coffee pods and figured staff may enjoy them. I likely would not have thought of this at all had she not complained. I prefer plain dark coffee myself but it waa fun to just put them.in there abd see the housekrooung staff get excited Boyt the coffee available to them. They of couse have no clue how it ended up there so I am sure feel a bit more apprechiated.
Seriously it is the little things in workplaces that matter.
Have coffee/ tea available for your staff. Snacks even better. Even a vending machine is apprechiated in spaces where folks are working long shifts abd might get asked yo work overtime. Especially when in low wage jobs!
So yeah the new job is just not as good as the one have had for years. I had a long stretch of working every weekend and at some point they had just cut my weekend hrs ( when I had the full time roles, other jobs over the years). I did not mind at the time. Everything has its season....
I think he would have welcomed me and all my kids if I had been willing to up and move. I mean he asked me time and time again to cone to zbuffsko. He talked of clearing out all the stuff upstairs and fixing tge bathroom up. It needs work
But the thing is he does not quickly follow through.
He definitely has neurodivergant traits abd eiukd do well with a helper/ partner who he welcomed the help from and nudging from.
I mean my parents were so content and happy but they both were self motivated so my idea of a good relationship is being in relationship with someone who has their shit together and follows through on what they say they want and intend to do but someone who is looking for support and positive encouragement NOT for someone to TELL them what they should be doing.
I feel like have dated a couple men who are kinda stuck and need some help but who won't go to counseling of life coaching to be decisively asking for that help and have maybe hoped I can provide that kind of support.
I feel like want to walk a path with somene. But they have to pick their path and I also have to pick mine and then we choose where and when we merge the two and walk together.
But I suppose I need my own time and rest respected as well.
Swear it it were not the drinking I would have been more open to converging paths.
That was the issue for me and still is. I had a nice chat but could hear the clincking of ice and slurring of words as it got later and later as we talked on the phone last night. I called excited to talk of my car 🚗 auction win.
I just know that would not have been a good idea for me.
Plain and simple.
But looking forward to planning our next excursion. Will travel and enjoy a weekend somewhere. My guy accepted giving up his seat on an overlooked flight when he was heading out of town for something last year. He was arriving a day early so had time. The voucher offer to give up seat kept increasing sbd no one took it. He held out; then negotiated and ended with $1100 cash voucher in exchange for giving up his seat.
He has two more weeks to book a ✈️.
He is planning one trip ( to a Bill's game with buddies) but should have money left so straight up offered it to me if I want to use it to go anywhere or plan a weekend with him.
Use it or lose it. I sad let's plan a weekend. Can't do it do often that IDK either get do attached in a way...like heartache when gone type of feelings... I mean that happens...and the fighting we do at times is frustration I know cause that can end real. I mean we both can't pretend we did not fall in love. One knows when they fall in love. Two know when they fall in love together.
How does that phenomena fucking happen? Damn.
Ok I need coffee ☕️...and to chill with my novel and not think how it is inherently heartbreaking when fall in love with an alcoholic.
No I am not the controlling type who would demand it.
No one can want to change that but the addict. And even then many who want to change it will try and fail
But there are those who try and succeed.
There are some good resources.
And Newport Academy. That take insurance. Hell if my angsty angry gamer teens not working and not in school woukd go into treatment for depression I woukd send them
Refusal at suggestions
Can't force someone.
Those programs take insurance.
Yesterday I did get distracted.
This was my ADHD moment of the week:
Planned my day of doing some chores then biking to work at 1:30
So started boiling chicken peas I had soaked. We LOVE Hummus and after a tiny amt in the sampler bought from the Greek Deli that was good but really only so so... (To be honest it was disappointing and overpriced for $18. Sampler "Platter" but in one to go box with the salad lumped in with meats small cups of hummus Taziki and a simple dressing just like I could make at home with vinegar and oil and very few spices. Bad to be honest is my review of their food. Chicken tough and overcooked : forget name of thr chopped lamb meat into a strip you get with Slovakie but tell ya Bufflo has a few good Greek restaurantsso this place was big time disappointing as never had such blah so cslled Greek food before.)
You soak dried chick peas overnight , boil beans on high then turn to simmer for 60 to 75 minutes ( sometimes I swear more!)
She of couse said " I called xxxx and they can give you a ride..."
My one kid was in living room doing whatever. I swear of the kid did not complain at any noise
I mean normal noise
(But I also don't want the kids to just be in their rooms all the time
HOW DO YOU STOP FAMILY CYCLES of behavior patterns repeating? )
So.... I at times think I am being courteous like I did yesterday when I then walked OUTSIDE
To take the quick call. I walked out front ( Why? Back door in kitchen woud have walked back in the kitchen).
So I come in and fog itching yo go out too. Grab the leash, smell a smoky smell and literally think / smells like burnt popcorn 🍿. We have popcorn and no other snacks left in tge house so my brain assumed " teen in room in front of TV, popcorn "
But notice tern also gone abd figured made popcorn and went upstairs.
Ot was like a 30 sec phone call ...
Forgot the bean
Get a text "Where the hrll are you? Your gonna burn the house down "
ADHD Moment of the week - 2023-05-31
WHEW yeah work came in. - 2023-05-31
Holding off on car, even the nice Volvo. - 2023-05-30
Seller called Ebay and took care of refund! - 2023-05-30
Found a good company car after all pretty quickly. - 2023-05-30