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2022-03-15 - 3:37 p.m.

Just now saddened to see another one of those who thought found love divorced after a couple of years only.

I am sad for my SIL who my brother divorced that it did not work out for her with her 2nd hubby.

Happy she has a beautiful little boy she is focused on raising. He is about 3 I think.

But surprised and bummed for her it did not work out.

It took me quite a bit to understand why my bother got divorced. Maybe it had something to do with her wanting a kid? Maybe there is still love and hope for them? Maybe she realized that she was just seeking his replacement...

who knows... cause I know this much:
It was like she was hurt then started dating it seemed to me cause she was looking to get married cause she wanted a kid.

And that just was not happening with my bro, AND I can't help but had noticed and even joked with her at the time it was like she got an upgraded version of at my bro! ( so to speak! I mean her new husband couldn't have been MORE LIKE HIM it seemed)

just rambling here so there may be no merit in those perceptions.

No ones fault necessarily when two married people can't work out and both be happy when one has to necessarily give up on a dream. I felt like if they stayed married she was the one who was giving up on her dream of>I almost thought my bro was divorcing and letting her go so she could go have her own kid

It was not my business. So I never discussed. Just my observation and FEELINGS And thoughts.
as our whole family loves her. My kids still have a relationship with her. My AUNTS and COUSINS and extended family Still LOVE HER

YES they all still maintain contact. Like ALL our extended family still is FB friends and just LOVES HER as much as we love my bro.

That did not sever or end when they divorced. Their relationship is between them but each of our individual relationships are each of ours.

So I am saddened to see she has some difficulty and shows SINGLE and posted about how she is happy to be empowered to let go of people who do not have aligned values and energy.
She wants positive energy and not negative folks in her life bringing HER DOWN.

I SOoooo GET THAT!!!

Just hope she is happy. I AM happy she has the child she longed to have. Maybe I will get together with her again someday as would so enjoy that.

I have no idea there issues; not my business; and don't care to know...
but I would enjoy if have opportunity to connect with her again sometime.

I ALSO would love if my bro would visit here. I invited him; and my other bro and SIL and they might come for a visit.

I will definitely plan a trip to visit my Dad and family who live in FL with him this summer.

I have FOUR children graduating this year! SO planning to celebrate and hope some of the family will travel here for that celebration!!!
ONE with a graduate degree; one college BA degree and two HS degrees.

OH and the one who has been dragging feet finally accepted some help of discussing their college aspirations. ABOUT TIME!!

She needs to get a portfolio done to apply. TEN ART PIECES in order to apply to the arts program she is interested in. I think she has two or three woodwork pieces so needs to photograph them AND DO Some other studio art to even apply to have a portfolio. She wants to do studio art , woodwork and metal work.

I think the way to do it is find a class to take so there is structure and work on the class with goal of getting a portfolio.
MAYBE my kid will get it together and get an application in for FALL. VERY LATE NOW but possible....
and MAYBE she could get in.. .
BUT I think it is fine if she needs to work a year and take some local art classes to get a portfolio.
There are a couple resources around. One guy in the area taught at a number of college art programs and makes a living now as a working artist of sculptures that sell for thousands of dollars while still teaching adjunct at a couple colleges and an art school while teaching his own private sessions. He has a stone carving class.

I am not sure why when I sent info her Dad FREAKED out saying it is a bad idea to encourage that as if that is encouraging NOT going to college. NO Its encouraging preparation and the required art education to GET INTO the college program she wants.
She is not yet prepared frankly. I gave her some contacts to reach out to MONTHS and MONTHS AGO but she never did. I sent a couple emails on her behalf with her permission- but I need to keep at it and offere more help. I am just glad FINALLY she is open to a bit more help! I need to see if she EVER successfully submitted the completed FAFSA Which ONLY needed her signature! That is the worst part. This kid had the FAFSA and the Common APP both about 95 % done but did not compete and submit them. In any case, there is ability to apply direct to the college of her choice- but there is no way to be considered without a portfolio and frankly art programs are competitive.

Its so interesting some don't realize you HAVE TO DO THE WORK if you want to have the opportunity,
ART PROGRAMS that are good are NOT easier to get into than other college programs.
This is not a back up plan for not knowing what she wants to do it is what she has decided she WANTS TO DO.
And it is not easy to now having figured that out suddenly be ready OVERNIGHT.

So I get it how she was overwhelmed--- but she needs to learn to ASK FOR HELP and make a plan to achieve goals rather than shutting down when overwhelmed!

AS for me I tackled the toughest to do on my list:
I asked MY EMPLOYER for a reference for my new business. They were well aware when I was hired a yr ago of my company. I negotiated to have right to run my own company and made it clear I was taking the job with them BECAUSE it is part time and supports that.

So will see what they say.

I mean it is just hard to get references from prior employers but for the co workers who actually are interested in working on project with my company. The problem is they can't give references as they are interested in being pitched on projects! CATCH 22 I have a few folks who would love some pick up project work in their area of SME that I worked with prior.

I also am not that organized. I recall STEVE was the name of the one co worker who always said "You are going to be a CEO someday." He was serious. He told me I have waht it takes as a visionary leader. He watched me in that orbit of the space we worked as I led.... that was a great time at that one workplace AT FIRST.

MY boss was getting ready to retire... OH I just though I should call her! I did think of her when driving but not for a reference but to catch up. She DID retire and moved to FL herself. I do touch base a couple times a year to see how she and her family are doing. Its been a while...
YES ADDING HER NAME ON MY TO DO to call... 1. Socially first then 2. Professionally!

My friend here I go walking with and I someday want to take a gal trip to FL and visit her as well as some of my friend's old friends (she used to live in FL). She understands my FAMILY TRIP is first on the agenda but THEN we will travel together for a gal trip sometime! (She retired from the same workplace this year! She had a SECRET second career as a PT!! I just love her and that fact that she never let anyone at our shared workplace know that on weekends she was working as a PT at a hospital! She QUIT - retired from her operations work where she used her computer science degree and picked up more PT work in the hospital once COVID hit. It fulfilled her more and she was much happier doing that!! We met and walked outside at a part near her home being cautious and careful and neither of us caught COVID despite her hospital work and my work at the retirement community cause Health care workers who follow masking and best practices for universal precaution fared rather well. It is the ones who got TOO FAMILIAR with risk that were then not careful who got sick!

OH one funny thing. I ran into my lover's MOTHER when I went to the pharmacy the other day. This lady asked me "Do you need to wait in this line if you got a notification a prescription is ready?"
I was standing there with my college student home on break, We turned and lo and behold it was my LOVER'S MOM.


He HAS NOT mentioned this fling thing,,, not serious...non dating just hook up once in a while thing to his mother. NOR WILL HE
unless he falls for me LOL

which is not something I consider with seriousness.

He has to figure out his stuff and what he really wants in life.

But it WAS super nice to catch up with her as we are friendly acquaintances. It was great to hear her brag about all her kids! LOL him included...

I heard about all these things I already knew about and so was very quiet listening.
It was kinda funny.
It WAS Great to hear her talk of the youngest of her kids who I used to work with! He was just the NICEST KID. She is in her mid 60s- a good 13 yrs older than me.

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