2022-12-30 - 5:39 p.m.

OK I don't care if it is not high art; and if it is silly and at times cheesy even crappy TV

I am actually now aware that Legends of Tomorrow was CANCELLED after seven seasons

And I am going to miss binge watching it on slow Saturday nights when at the retirement community

simply as a friend (former roommate) of my son is in it
and the character he played was hilarious.

FAN MOM moment as it is a hoot to watch any shows my friend land in.

So EVEN AS these young actors grow to get BETTER roles and move on...

I still find it fun to watch their early work.

And this actor is moved on

But I still have some old episodes to catch up on in the Legends body of work!

SO I am happy it is on Netflix!

And when there is a need to retreat and just recoup after the tough ...

well interaction

of my young adults kids insisting on all gathering to tell me how they feel like I NEVER listen to them
or pay attention to them

Well.

I don't feel much like spending time with them as it is EXHAUSTING

and I am not going to mind spening this Friday night escaping with Legends.

I work the next couple days.

And I just checked on the college gal to confirm they have shored up their plans to get back to college-

cause according to their mind and their Dad's it was MY Obligation last break and he was helping out the kid on THIS BREAK

but it is stressful to find the kid DOES NOT have a plan for getting back.

I was just checking

to find the kid ASSUMED that I could drive them back.

MID JAN

I suggested the kid consider working the next couple weeks to earn some dough-

mainly as the kid will have to get back to school and if has money it might make it easier to get on a bus at least. I mean I don't think my car that is driving 20 mph when accellerating uphill is going to be the best choice to be transportation back to school for the college student.

And I can't fucking believe they don't have a plan to get back yet.

Cause last I checked it was not my obligation/responsibility
but if the kid is here well that kinda drops it on me

somehow.

Shit

So I am going to go back to Season 1 Episdode 1-

and chill for a bit and watch Legends.

I just would watch the most recent episodes kinda randomly and never caught the early shows.

I am just going to chill and watch a few early episodes.
Anc then jump to some of the later ones to catch the young actor I watched hone skill through conservatory as would travel and catch performances and he was the roomie etc..
so watched the development.

It is kinda fun.

I mean it was even excited for me the last time I watched the most recent episode of my son on his TV show ( cheesy funny soap) that a commercial came on which featured one of his more RECENT roommies! HA HA The gal who was actually the literal college RA for the theater conservatory bunch, who was a later NYC roomie pre Covid before she moved to LA.

It was so fun to see her in a commercial in the middle of the latest episode of his work!!

Just nice these actors are working.

Those who WANT TO

Some of his cool friends/ classmates just decided that they had OTHER Callings in life and being an actor was just NOT for them.

Total respect for each of them who found their passion lied elsewhere and they did not LOVE the work enough to choose the life.

It is a grind.
and get work but in between have to CREATE work and have a strong sense of self and purpose to be happy doing other things

and be happy with the PROCESS the whole time.
Be happy with moving from project to project without attachment.

So even thought the actors are not attached and it is just a paycheck
and they couldn't care less when they do a project and it ends and they move on

It is STILL super fun to see their work , and how it has created something just sheer fun
or escapist
or silly

and which can be a little bit of escape in entertainment

when need to relax.

The one teen is in middle of living room doing their own thing. It does make it kinda hard to pull out a movie for the whole family.

I am tired and don't feel like arguing and the negativity and criticism
I mean of even going downstairs and having someone yell at me cause I moved their stuff when I straighten up

just makes me want to retreat just now.
And how it was so controlling of me to expect the kids to all come in and join is some activity I preplanned without their input. My kid asked "What did you expect? YOu set that up so we would all be pissed off cause it was controlling?"
I was like
"What the fuck are you talking about? Cause I said "let's watch this episode while I cook and play a silly game?"

I told the kid I was just trying to do the Christmas tradition thing of family game playing. Cause you know you don't go to church , no one wants to, you won't go on a hike/walk to the park and visit the local beautiful moutains which I like to do -
I mean all the family traditions I tried to set up and we did as they were growing up they don't WANT TO DO- so I was just trying to retain ONE
And the kid was like
But you picking the game and expecting us to all do it is the way to get us all NOT WANT TO DO IT

which I was like
"Why?" That makes no sense to me??

I mean what the fuck?
by virtue of me ASKING Them to do this with me all together they immediately would not want to do it?
I really don't get it.

And I said-
But when you said NO you didn't want to join in then I was like-OK
and the one who did want to watch joined me in the kichen but let you do your own thing
BUT The kid felt like we excluded and abandoned her.

So messed
I mean can't win with these kids.

The kid said I should have asked them what game they wanted to play.

I said- "I think you missed the point. Every Christmas we get a NEW family game and no matter how stupid we play it together!"

I mean- I said "It is the one tradition I was trying to hold onto"

Whatever-

so I need to escape a bit.

SO BE IT

Onto legends

Silly and fun.
Glad it is on Netflix! (Just found that out tonight too!)

I am starting at S1 E1

Maybe after a bit will see if anyone else has interest and see if they want to watch together in the living room.

But just for a few minutes going to relax until I don't feel quite so disappointed by how fucked up this feels.

That folks are so sensitive and can't just come together without fighting
but then there is also no planning ( like even on how to get back to school)
BUT then if I plan anything resentment... but then this sense it is my obligation still to do the planning for basics...( I mean like getting anything done. Resentment of me but if I don't do planning things like the wisdom teeth pull of the kid getting back to college might not happen).

WTF

It is just parenting I guess.
A thankless job at times but have to suck it up and keep at it.

BUT really -
just a little break from the unappreciation for a few minutes before re-engaging.

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